A celebrity-obsessed culture that belittles us all

Perhaps it's my upbringing, that I learned early on to draw strength from within and inspiration from immediate people around me, rather than celebrities. Are people's lives so empty that they would become devastated that a hyped-up media star passed away?!

Sure, we all admire talented individuals, but to see people crying, the endless tweets and facebook status updates that go on and on about the recent passing of Michael Jackson and Farrah Fawcett, I have to wonder, do people live their own lives anymore?! Yes, it's tragic that someone died, but when we place celebrities above us all, we have, in effect, allow them to have undue influence on our lives. If we start to examine our own lives, what we can do to improve ours and those around us, then we would have a better, more cohesive and harmonious world. Instead, at least in America, we are constantly goaded by the media, to celebrate, to aspire to, and to dream to become among these celebrities.

When I started this blog over two years ago, I was sucked into this whirlwind of becoming somebody, when in reality, I was and still am somebody to people who care about me and vice versa. Why are we so obsessed with seeking approval from others?! A celebrity-obsessed culture is the hallmark sign that we have taken the wrong turn, we don't value each other and those around us, but we constantly chase this image that marketeers conjured up and profiteers use to hustle us. Think of memorabilia, think of what media companies will make off his death by selling us more craps that we don't need by playing on our emotions.

We all should take a step back, re-examine our lives, re-prioritize our goals, and re-evaluate our progress, instead of getting whipped into this media frenzy. Think about what is important, be with people who accept us already, instead of getting herded into the mosh pit to grief for celebrities who really should not be that influential in our lives. I know there is a downside to not wishing to become celebrities, there will be fewer starlets, fewer porn stars, and more responsible adults. May be, just may be, we will have a more productive society that doesn't squander our time and energy but to focus them on those immediately around us and who we really are, rather than what we are told to be.

Why she will win...

Sarah Palin, VP-ILK'08!

I think this is totally HAWWWT!

See more funny videos at Funny or Die

Yes, I'm back, bitches!

While I was in hibernation...

I often joke how I've learned more about history by watching TV than what I studied in books. One of the great figures in our American history that few recognized is John Adams. Definitely go check out the HBO's 7-part series: John Adams. This series dramatizes the hardship, growth, prosperity, finally, achievement of becoming the POTUSA, and of course, the inevitable decline of the man.

One dark page in our 20th century World History that most forgot is the rape of Nanking. Check out the acclaimed movie that was released last year. I'm not sure the atrocities committed by one side within a single war is a reflection on the psyche and cultural values of one particular group of people. It does make me wonder...

Ken Lee!

Contrast this:

With this:

Should I be nice to girls?

This question often crosses the mind of guys when they interact with girls. The scenario is so-and-so is pretty hot, I want to ask her out, if I'm nice to her, buy her drinks, then may be we can start chatting, etc. The answer is an unequivocal no. However, if I am a genuinely nice person and I come from a place that I don't need her to make me happy, then being nice to girls is okay... Again, the answer is a conditional yes. What do I mean by that?

Before I elaborate on the details on what to do, let's start with the frame, or the conditions by which we conduct ourselves. Nice guys often have been trampled and used by girls in the past and so in reaction, they tend to become assholish to get back at girls. This reactivity is not congruent with those guys and girls can see through that... and why let girls dictate how we behave?! Instead, the better frame would be that (1) we have choices with girls, (2) we are here to evaluate or we decide whether they are worthy to be with us, (3) they are chasing us and we lead.

With those guidelines in mind, then the answer is that we are nice to girls when we feel they deserve us. This begins with how we initiate our conversation with girls... Unless we have the attitude that we don't care how she might respond to us in the beginning, it's best not to compliment girls first. There are exceptions, however. Say I want to ask her something about fashion, I can start with, "Hey, you seem like you know about fashion..." and look her up & down in a non-creepy way. Now, I just complimented her AND I already subcommunicated to her that I also evaluated her, so I have a reason to talk with her.

Once that we have started talking with girls, we can role play... and to further re-inforce our frame that we are superior, leading, higher, and be the daddy figure that she is looking for, she is almost always subservient. Again, this requires finesse to do successfully... by being fun and playful which she knows on one hand that we are joking and on another, we subtly communicated to her that we are not there to please her but to evaluate her. I even explicitly say that I will give her a job performance review later because she has been working very hard for a promotion. There is a huge difference between evaluating vs. judging her.

This gets back to the common question of whether we can compliment girls, the answer is a conditional yes. We should praise them when we feel they deserve it. There are more subtleties of how this is done. For girls who are hot in the looks department, then focus on her intellect, i.e., some things that most people don't see. Again, it's okay to be a nice guy, not just any Joe Schmoe nice guy. For girls who aren't that good looking, then focus on some positive aspects of their look. This should be avoided in general unless you know what you are doing. The more vague, at least among straight guys, of the compliment, the better... nebulous things like outlook, energy, vibe, sexy... which guys usually don't talk about.

As for doing things just to be nice to girls, again, only when they deserve it. If she has been cool and fun, then it's ok to buy her drinks or even dinner, only if it was just appetizer, and, she has been a good conversationalist. The trick of being a playful evaluator is to be tricky, and be ready to throw her a curve ball now and then. There's more to being a conditional nice guy that I will elaborate on next time. Until next time, follow his advice...

It is what it is...

Some people have read this and wondered why am I not what I appear to be on here. I know there are quite a few people try to psychoanalyze me using my posts here... good luck in figuring me out! The closest analogy I can think of this blog is this...

You know, when you consume an excess amount of veggies, and if you are not regular, may be you take some fiber supplements. So you feel a bit gaseous and have this urge to just let loose. Well, this is what this blog is for me. This is my mental crapper. If you haven't tried colonic, I find blogging as a wonderful relief for the mental constipation that I sometimes feel. So you've been warned! Don't bother turning on the fan so that you can clear the air and get a glimpse of what's happening. Don't bother lighting candles to cover up that smell. On the one hand, the stench drives many away, but on the other, people are inherently curious to see what's up. So here you are.

Once in awhile, you might find a gem or two in my posts. It's like hunting for diamonds in a landfill. If you do find diamonds there, they probably are not the result of spontaneous localized pressure that created diamonds in situ, but someone accidentally discarded them. In other words, my ideas have probably been published elsewhere or that people don't realize that how valuable their ideas really are, at least for me! I don't expect people to get what I post right away or to even understand why I blog in the first place. I blog because I can.

MANY people use blogs as a marketing tool, which I do sometimes when I feel the urge to experiment or to mess with people. Some bloggers use this as a tool to seek validation or to prove something to someone out there in the ether. Some chronicle their lives online, some lie, some fabricate, some exaggerate, more bullshit as far as I'm concerned. There are some bloggers who use this medium to advocate for something. A few try to be helpful, which I did long ago and I think some of my ideas have taken hold or at least helped people kill time. I'm not egotistical enough to think that I can change the world, I just make the best of it.

In the end, I go for a good laugh. You probably won't find what I post here that funny or I would have became a professional comedian. This is also not a good place to keep a tab on me or to stalk me online, it's almost like looking at my shit to figure out what I ate. You better be a professional in forensic. And believe me, eating is not the only activity I do but it sure seems to be if you are a regular reader of my blog! I'm not going to pretend to be someone I'm not, and if you ask people who truly know me, they will tell you that I... I'm just one among six billions. The world is a big & wondrous place with plenty of people.

My focus is rarely on the few winners, not that I want to or can be the champion for the underdog, I believe people should go for what works for many instead of buying into the marketing hype. I can appreciate the nuance and complexity within my reality. It is what it is... for me. Don't worry, I will go back to making fun of closeted gays in the community and delusional dumbfucks who buy into the whole self-improvement & passive income bullshit, I'm juvenile that way.

Rules of seduction

Would we better off with KJ's (and gay dating coaches trying to seduce those KJ's) OR these awkward hustlers?

Ode to the game

Guess who?!

Credit to Possibility for discovering this... Who could he be?

And for those who still are sucking it up out there... after all these years:

It's not just any blog, it's...

What happened to HBO? I didn't particularly care for Sex and the City; at least it had witty dialogs. There were the Sopranos, Curb Your Enthusiasm, Real Time with Bill Maher when he was still funny. Recently, Rome was promising until it tanked second season. If ER can carry on for longer than my training in school, I don't see how Rome couldn't. Big Love was interesting first season, I doubt that it can carry on much longer. And the latest debacle, Tell me you love me, is just bad drama. It has a beautiful cast acting out mundane life with realistic sex scenes; how many of us want to see our new High Def flat-screen as a mirror to reflect our boring lives back?! We want to watch senseless acts of violence, over-the-hill cosmo-drinking waddle-shaking "girls" getting it on, or perhaps, a crazy Jew who behaves inappropriately all the time.

With TMYLM, it reminds people of what they don't want, boring lives, unfulfilling marriages, daily drudgery, and to add on top of that, counseling sessions to discuss the aforementioned topics. We want our flat-screen to be the secret mirror of fantasies we can escape to after a long day at work or another silly fight with our sperm receptacles. Californication on Showtime shows potential, at least the dialog is funny.

For my digital "BTivo," I'm keeping CYE, RT (hopefully, Bill Maher will be funnier), and Californication. Of course, the Daily Show and the Colbert Report just to keep up with news.