Friday, December 28, 2007

Cultivating a core group of friends

After all my bashings of the community, 2007 has been my turning point, away from the community and rejoin the normal humanity. Instead of amassing, reading, watching, listening to more community bullshit, then get on "seduction forums" to mentally masturbate with other keyboard jockeys, I went on an almost weekly diatribe about the evil of these forums and most of their participants, which inevitably drove most of these losers out of my life.

My view is still the same, some of the materials are good, but only from well known established guys, the rest is just copycat. Most participants in seduction forums are losers, the longer they are on them, the more likely they are failures, not just in getting girls, but in life. The best way to learn is still to go out alone, befriend people, cultivate a core group of friends, not just to go out and pick up girls, but people who are reliable, trustworthy, social, fun, you know the term that "AFCs" called, "friends."

I didn't realize how far I have steered off the normal path by community losers until girls asked me why was I surrounded by creepy, socially awkward losers. Then I re-examined my relationships with these losers, and there is definitely something off about them. They simply don't know how to maintain friendship. They are so obsessed with pursuing fame and/or fortune by cannibalizing each others. Sure, there is still friction with friends, but we have fun together, we rely on each other, we help each other, many of these social skills that these losers don't have. Sadly, no amount of workshops, newbie missions, bootcamps, wings, forums, and whatever else will instill in them a sense of humanity.

The blatant marketing ploys of selling more materials and workshops continue, but there is a trend toward cooperation between these vultures. Guys who aren't so good would "DHV" each other by vouching for each other. They also talk about the higher purpose of helping men, improving lives of many. I have no doubt that a few men have benefited, the rest just serves as another revenue stream for these hustlers.

Ultimately, this year has been a year of self-discovery. I discovered who and what I am. I have yet to realize my full potential, but I know some pitfalls, who and what to avoid, the best way to succeed is not just about consuming more materials, but rather, to do/act without much forethought, don't worry about failures, don't bother to scheme and plan ways to get people. I should, instead, lead a life that enriches myself and others. This means that I'm not trying to "get sex" or take something away from people. Or in community lingo, bringing value to any interaction. Sex is a by-product of a successful life, not as a panacea for failing to live.

And living is worthwhile if one's life is shared with friends. The constant cycle of pump and dump one girl after another is a reflection of one's lack of character, lack of a "life." If our lives are to be meaningful, we have friends to be on this journey.

With that, I might return in 2008, or not... who knows?!

Sunday, December 23, 2007

The human whisperer

I was having a conversation with someone who just finished watching more in-field videos of pickup, yeah, they are all the rage right now. He was saying how the analysis by girls was all wrong... well, no shit. I think we can learn much more by watching the National Geographic TV: The Dog Whisperer with Cesar Millan.

The reason we are natural born followers is that we are genetically programmed to be pack/herd animals. In fact, I postulate that most of the world has the common delusion in believing in god because it is the most alpha/pack leader. So I wouldn't be surprised if we will locate a nucleus of neurons in our brain that is the "god center." Back to why we all should watch The Dog Whisperer.

An oft-repeated phrase that Cesar Millan used is that we should project "a calm assertive energy" and if we express what we want, people will comply. People have many commonalities with dogs... namely, our inherent natural tendency to follow the pack leader. In order to exude or project that to influence others, we must be at peace with ourselves, be comfortable in the environment, and we are social fun people... this is conveyed by our body language.

Going back to the same friend I had a discussion about how lame the analysis by girls and even worst was how ugly the girls getting picked up were! People who are not at peace with themselves or with others around them rarely if ever project that calm assertive energy. Girls have told me that they became physical with me because they not only felt right about what we were doing but they felt that was something I wanted! Sure, we need a brief initial attraction, just something to pique their interest. Then we have to shift gear into peaceful calm state but also be sufficiently pushy, because we have directions, goals, and ways to get there.

So if you are just starting, just go out, don't try to game, acclimate yourself to the environment, then slowly start talking to people, learn to have boring normal small talks... slowly weave in stories... learn to tease... then work the group using your "calm assertive energy." If you want to tame humans, start with learning how to get dogs to do what you want, pretty soon, you can turn girls into your bitches.

Friday, December 21, 2007

The girlfriend experience

I started writing this a few days ago, because I was so disturbed by what I saw. So I talked to a few friends about this topic... surprisingly, guys seem to be more against it and girls seem to be much more pragmatic about it. This started when I came across this C4 program: My Boyfriend The Sex Tourist.

The first part of the program showed guys going to these essentially brothels in a South American country where they have a selection of girls to pretend to be their girlfriends. That didn't bother me as much as how many of these guys resemble guys I've met in the community. The obligatory fat old guy, the ok-looking but creepy guy, and an effeminate guy who is in denial. All old, all desperate, all obviously come across as people who not only lack female companionship but also male buddies.

Because of my past history dealing with these losers, my opinion on the whole exploitive nature, how we are basically outsourcing sex. I was quite tolerant of people in the past, not just out of obligation but because I truly felt that everyone deserves a chance. Then I came into contact with these losers en masse in the community. My opinion gradually changed because I feel some of these people should not breed for the same reason that they can't be part of the herd.

I think it's fun to socialize with people, connect emotionally and physically. But the psychopathic nature of these guys, how they pick out vulnerable groups of girls... from underage to recent arrivals (i.e. FOBs) because then, it's a HUGE DHV for them to be either adults (who can get them beer, saw Superbad?) or as "Americans" (who know what's going on). Everyone can use more sex... but we have to draw the line somewhere, from the legal age (or we end up with more Britney's baby sis situation) to banning importation of sex workers. Seriously, if guys can't pick up girls their own age (i.e. above legal age) or girls who have similar background (similar awareness, intelligence, education, profession), then what do we have?

Some girls told me it's a mutual exploitation thing. Like any business transaction, is it mutual and fair? How do we decide if we don't have some arbitrary rules? Do children need protection? What about mentally handicapped adults? What about adults who are not as culturally aware?

Do these people need our protection? Or do we need to exert some self-control and not exploit vulnerabilities in others?! Most pickup methods are used for fun and games, because they can be used in social situations. But the psychopathic nature of these guys, they use them to exploit... I guess that's when I draw the line, from being a social guy who gets girls to being a hustler.

P.S. If you want to be good with women, get this book.

Wednesday, December 19, 2007

Girlfriends come and go

We made them come and hopefully, they will leave soon after. Be loud!

Monday, December 17, 2007

The easiest way to game

I try to keep up with some PU blogs and some of them are quite good. A recent entry by Juggler on how to SOI properly is a good read. It's still too complicated...

From what little experience I have, SOI is unnecessary if the girl is super attracted and sometimes, no matter how many disqualifications, negs, SOIs, push-pulls, she simply won't comply. Someone suggested I use game accelerators, I'm more likely to lose money betting on that than on a much simpler concept, it's the big number theory. If I talk with a large number of girls, eventually, I will get laid. Add in the mist of alcohol-induced haze, loud music, and just overall sex deprived state of most people, there's really no need for being so methodical.

In fact, I see the more people focused on this/that method, took multiple bootcamps, winged with more guys from the community, the less likely they have improved. For the simple reason of they focus too much on gaming, and not on having fun, being with people. Of course, there's also the flip side of being party animals while remaining celibate.

There is only one way to strike that right balance, that's using the In-her game (tm) method. Seriously though, this is really a numbers game. The more people we interact with, the quicker we will learn to click with people. Once we have acquired the ability to befriend and get people to open up to us... girls will soon open their legs, or at least bend over, and no, you don't need to drop a few grands on a workshop to learn that. Spend that on yourself. Then you can save yourself from learning a whole new vocabulary, microloop, microcalibration, DHV, IOI-IOD, push-pull, SOI, false sexual barriers, false time constraint, etc. Who else speak in specialized languages, abnormal people, but they make money speaking it... PUA-wannabe's are losing money and control by using other people's language.

There's no need to give away our power and ability to master our own destiny. The only way to succeed is to fail. There's no better way to toughen ourselves than getting hurt. No dating coach or anyone else can insulate us from pain of life, we learn from both negative and positive reinforcements. Those who do their best to avoid pain are avoiding life.

Friday, December 14, 2007

Computerized routines stack?

If this is true, another point for people running routines... and why it would work. For those with massive approach anxiety, one day, your computer may pick girls up, especially lonely needy attention starved fat "chicks on the internet," for you!

Tuesday, December 11, 2007

Rules of seduction

Would we better off with KJ's (and gay dating coaches trying to seduce those KJ's) OR these awkward hustlers?

Monday, December 10, 2007

Thursday, December 6, 2007

A men's movement?

Or are we raising a whole new generation of social retards?! Every time I hear someone talks about their "match date," I cringe. How have we evolved to the point that the only connection with people is through online? In fact, I would attribute our pussification to people not having the balls to deal with each other in person.

Before classifying me as a Luddite/technophobe, I started using IRC back when it was a telnet connection, no IRC client, no dozen IRC networks, in fact, I was using IRC on and off up until last year when it just sucked up too much of my free time, you know, away from time I can spend with ladies, not ladyboys! And yes, I have met my share of people online, mostly guys though. Some of them have been normal, but the majority, something about them is just a little bit off.

Why the diversion? Because the community is driven mostly by online forums, seduction websites, and blogs like this (and yes, this is only one thin slice out of my life). I have met quite a few bona fide PUA and I have seen most of them in action. Some of these guys are big shots at well known dating/seduction companies. One common statement they made, repetitively, is that they are helping men. Are they?

I'm in the business of helping people, professionally. The dirty little secret is that most of us do it because it's our job, sure, we make a difference here and there, but primarily, because this is all that we know how to do, or put it another way, we don't know how to do anything else. I would say the same about dating coaches, they suffer from the same Peter Principle syndrome. If I were to strip them away from "helping men," they would have to go back to their menial sales jobs making cold calls. Few, if any, left successful careers to be doing this. So do they truly do this out of altruism, or this is a career by exclusion. By that, I mean they do this as a last resort with nothing else to choose from?!

The sad part is... even though this isn't that bad of a job... most guys who do this are just hustler-wannabes. They have no skills... not even social skills; even a social retard, like myself, can tool them. Assuming the veracity of their reports, blogs, and mutual DHV's from their buddies can be backed up, VERY FEW of these guys are any good. Even if they are good, are they any good at teaching other guys?

This is no men's movement. We are becoming more and more like bonobo chimps, i.e., we are more free in expressing our sexuality, becoming more slutty, for both sexes. But somehow, a generation of social retards that's raised on computer think they have the solution of getting sex. The best thing to do is, just like how you wean yourself off internet porn, just push yourself away from your keyboard and go meet some people. Instead of whipping out your credit card to sign up for more workshops, buy more seduction materials, subscribe to more exclusive/collector's/premiere content. Just go out and interact with people, you will appreciate so many more nuances than just a blinking cursor.

Tuesday, December 4, 2007

The solution...

If you don't have the courage to go out and talk to girls... try this:

Don't know how to start? Join your local lair, and start PM'ing those guys who posted all those FR/LR, and those who offer workshop/bootcamp, just for the local lair members! They might not blow you away with their skills, but they are very skilled in blowing you!

Sunday, December 2, 2007

Letting go...

Approval seeking behavior can permeate from the initial approach all the way throughout the relationship. Success in opening all the way to !closing, in part, depends on not trying to get approval, IOI, validation,... from anyone, and especially girls. Being needy is usually unattractive to girls, especially if they are not attracted to the guy, and if he persists, he will be creepy. But if she's attracted, and the guy is needy, he might come across as endearing... at least in the beginning.

When I hang out with friends, I am open and honest with them, I say what's on my mind, usually without much filter between what goes on in my brain and what I verbalize. In fact, this blog is pretty much the same way. There's no need to create an avatar, a persona, something "attractive" to girls (or guys). I just be who I am. I live my life and whatever comes up, I'm sure I can deal with it. I find having the attitude of living in the moment very freeing; i.e., I don't get encumbered by the past or fixated about what to come.

This spontaneity is very important when I first meet someone. We have no history together and chances are, we probably won't have a future together. Our paths are crossing at this point and that's it. As nihilistic as this may sound, I find having this mindset very helpful in interacting with people; I don't want to take anything from them, I'm just there.

Another is once that I am in a relationship, I don't make myself too available and I also don't expect the same from girls. We limit how much time we spend together and we touch base once in awhile, mostly to set up a time to "meet." It's funny how when I let them go, they will eventually come back. This, of course, is dependent on having a strong identity.

It's better to give than to receive...

And I'm not just talking about STD's. This is so unusual, the holiday season is usually a very contemplative, introspective, and consequently, very depressive time for me. But this year, I am out and about, carefree, happy, talking, and connecting with people. There are still a few things I find lacking...







Need I post more? We must bring that those glory days.

Saturday, December 1, 2007

Oh, the community!

What am going to do? Should I take another workshop so I can get that high again? If only I can find more wings! BWAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAH!

Thursday, November 29, 2007

Sometimes...

Run Forrest, RUN!!!

This dude can plow... watch it again!

Wednesday, November 28, 2007

The roadmap to be mPUA

When I read something so inspirational, someone worked hard to be where he is because he has balls... he doesn't have to:

  1. shave his head
  2. pretend to be a leader of men
  3. take pickup program/workshop, one after another
  4. learn to be authentic
  5. learn to be natural
  6. regurgitate advice from others without really any deep understanding
  7. use girls to get guys
  8. be petty little insecure boy
  9. try to rip off/cannibalize his "friends"
  10. be a rockstar/surfer/daytrader/stereotypical "character" who gets girls

when he can just be himself, a real man, push himself without prompting or coaching, take actions to get good, rather than paying for quick fixes. Read this and weep, oh right, I doubt that he cries after sex or when a girl rejects/dumps him!

Monday, November 26, 2007

How to sell

I was just reading this and then I started writing a very long comment... So here's my response. Many, privately and publicly, have asked me why I appear so negative... especially in this blog. I can justify myself by repeating the cliche, "I'm not a pessimist, I'm just a realist." The reality is that Nixon was partly right, the silent majority rarely speaks up because they are happy/satisfied/content with their current position, why bother to rise up to defend the status quo.

In order to argue for a new idea, a new perspective on the same old problem, how men meet women, people have to bash the current system, take the red pill, unplug from the matrix. In fact, I am arguing for the status quo. There's really nothing inherently good or bad about how men and women meet and how they start relationships. So someone decided to apply some socio-psychology ideas to how we interact with each other, then marketeers came in to up-sell these simple ideas. Then these "pickup blogs" sprung up like weeds to create this feeding frenzy, like everyone and anyone can become a pickup artist, and of course, we all can get any girl anywhere at anytime.

The truth is... sure, we can talk to MANY MORE people and have sex with a much bigger population (for some "Captain Ahab Poo-ah" they they do hook up with bigger girls). However, what they don't tell you is, that's how it has always been. Girls go out, girls get drunk, girls hook up with random strangers, and if you keep talking with enough girls, you will go home with some of them. Are all girls like this? Not really. Since this is a numbers game, I have met some wonderful people, some girls who can be potential life-long mates, and some, I am ashame to admit to.

Back to pessimism, when someone wants to us to buy the latest and greatest self-improvement product, they of course have to point out weaknesses, flaws, what is wrong/bad about our current situation so that they can provide the solution to this problem. (In re-reading my entry, I realized that someone already pointed this out to me awhile back... it's the basic structure of advertising) This is the basis behind most products and most dramas (you know, movies, superheroes,... which I learned in middle school). The best way to solve any problem, isn't to buy more products, sign up more workshop/bootcamp, when the solution is really very simple, as a friend pointed out today, start doing. Just like the Nike catchy slogan, Just Do It. I prefer: Git'r'done!

We can spend an eternity dwelling on a problem, try to determine its etiology, monitor its progress, when all we have to do... is to start doing. We had a long conversation about inner game over the weekend, the problem is that people don't take the first step, get away from mentally masturbate over something and take steps to solve the problem. Most successful people are do'ers, they don't sit around and figure out ways to change their conditions, they act, they work, they make mistakes, they correct their mistakes, and they eventually improve.

This is the reason I keep going on and on about the negative aspects of the community. I want to point out that these are caution signs that we all can avoid. Go out there and start talking with people, you will hear great stories, you'll get some pointers from people, make some new friends, you will be happier than keep reading these pickup blogs and especially this "pessimistic" blog. The more we focus internally, we will conjure up more demons to wrestle.

Self-acceptance, quit trying to seek validation from people, (you know the saying, be yourself) this is really about being a normal social human being... unless, of course, you have something to sell, then it's inherent that you have to seek validation from others, and in the community, it's all about stroking other guys. The world isn't as bad as people say... it's quite nice. I'm glad I'm alive to enjoy this, because I have nothing to sell. Sorry.

Saturday, November 24, 2007

A belated happy Thanksgiving!

I have much to be thankful for this year. Most of all, specifically related to having fun & being social, I feel I am part of humanity again... by being out of the community. Which reminds me...

During my first year in the community, I accidentally met up with some guys who were in the community about 3-4 years ago at a party. Although they seemed relatively normal, there was something game-y about them and somehow, I figured out they were at one time, in the community. We started talking and they told me about their trip to Hawaii, where they accidentally crossed path with TD and helped him teach a bootcamp. For some reasons, they never discussed why they were not active in the local community and they didn't offer much advice, unlike many "forum gurus." They seemed to be relatively happy and that was something that festered in the back of my head, which caused me to slowly question why seemingly normal people not in the community.

Then the onslaught of market droids in promoting one product after another, that's when I realized that we have been captive audience of an expanding niche market. Furthermore, the "lair/community guys" were mostly socially inept guys. How this came about was during my conversation with another friend recently, about why certain people who don't make good friends.

Most community guys don't make good friends, not simply because they are needy, but they are selfish horny pricks. Part of being friends is participating in a two-way process... For example, community guys would save up money for bootcamp (one after another), but they wouldn't go out and spend money with other guys. Another is that they would try to score simple things, like rides to bars/clubs, from each other. The worst part is when I introduce them to my non-community friends, be they were girls or guys, these community chodes would run game on them; even after I explicitly warned them that they do NOT run community materials on people I know.

Girls want to be picked up; or in their lingo, they want to meet someone special when they go out. But they certainly don't want to be an experimental lab animal in helping these guys master their games. There are so many ways to relate with people besides running games. These community dumbasses also apply silly alpha-male bullshit with each other in lair politics. In the game of life, profession,... some of us may not be experts at socializing with women, but we have played our share of office politics and other cut-throat bullshit to be where we are today. Playing these sorts of silly games with other guys is pathetic at best.

There are so many ways to be friends that I can't begin to cover them all, I can only point out of a few things of what not to do. I haven't socializing with lair guys lately, what I can write about is from my vague memory, and I'm sure they have figured out new ways to screw each other instead of girls. Yeah, I know... I write at least once per week about why people should stay away from community guys.

Thursday, November 22, 2007

What does 'having confidence' mean to women?

Have you ever wondered why people only get a certain type of girls? Some even turn that into a fetish... in order to cover their inability to connect with other people. That comes down to a problem of confidence. What do women mean when they say they are looking for confidence in men? Guys talk about growing balls, man up,... to do something. All these can be trace down to one thing.

I'm sure many can build up their innergame with various techniques, e.g. hypnosis, NLP,... By far, the best way of developing innergame is through competence. Competence stems from having experience. So having confidence in womenese really means someone with experience. Most girls want to be led and what they look for is someone who has the experience, someone who has done it before, someone who knows about other people (i.e. girls) like her, and ultimately, someone who knows what to do with her.

If you are the adventurous type and talked to a few girls who are different to you... maybe even out of your league. The best way to DHV (ugh, I know, "brag") yourself is to tell her a story, preferably a funny one, that lets her know that you have been with girls like her. Of course, if you don't know what kind of girls she is, then start going through your stack of stories with different types of girls. The goal is to subcommunicate that we have experience with girls like her and by inference, we know what to do with her, i.e., we can lead.

Some ways to have stories are: (1) be open to new experiences, live an adventurous life, (2) by proxy, through watching, reading, and talking with others, and (3) learn to tell stories. Successful guys are ones who don't set their lives to just get girls, guys who do become lair gurus or dating coaches, who are better at seducing guys than girls. The next step is to go out just to mingle and talk with strangers. I rarely ever game girls, in fact, keep the interaction light and fun. Game is really necessary once we are in isolation, then we have to slow down the interaction, where we turn from verbal to physical. That's why kino/touching early and often is important. We don't get the state break as we transition to physical. There are other techniques I'll cover in future blog posts.

So, grow some balls, man up, and start talking with strangers. Get into the mood of sharing with people. Eventually, we will build up a repertoire of stories, routines, and finally, experience with different types of girls. Why travel the world, when we can make girls from different parts of the world, umm, come to us?!

Sunday, November 18, 2007

Respect

Many have said but rarely ever adhere to, "Bros before hos." I am honor to be among a super secret elite group of sour grapes, who are definitely intermediate level PUAs, even though they seem disturbed, very disturbed. But we are still working on getting the solid 8's. And if you are not a local, you'd wonder WTF I've written.

Where we go in life is important, who we bring along is even more important. Awhile back, I've blogged quite a bit about having fun and being social. The result of that is to build up a circle if not more of friends who are the same way. Sure, life is so much more enjoyable when there is a group of people who are there along life's journey. Who our friends are reflections of different aspects within us... So if you wonder who you are, look around at who are there beside you.

There are some transient friends of convenience. I would group colleagues from work into this category. We might get along at work, but we don't socialize outside of work. There are also who we work together, watch out for each other, and finally, go out and socialize together. These are friends who we continue our friendships even after we parted ways at work. For this to happen, we must cultivate our friendships on a deeper set of values... not just sarging buddies of convenience, i.e. because we don't have girls to hang out to be our "pivots."

I'm not proud to admit, at one point in my life, I was quite active in the community. I attended countless meetings, met up with master PUAs on their road shows, and even went out with some of them. Even more embarrassing was that I actually "sarged" with some social retards, we have done our shares of creeping girls out; but I have grown out of that. It was like my awkward phase of social adolescence. When my social face had countless zits, I was wondering what was happening inside me, and why I had trouble fitting in. Then I came to the realization.

I had more than the one main goal of getting girls. Sure, sex is fun, and sex is definitely more fun that "sarging." I realized that I was socially awkward because I was uncomfortable with who I am. Until I started accepting, then liking who I am and will be, I could not deal with the external social world. The second part was to align myself with relatively social people, who also have that part of their lives sorted out. They are comfortable with themselves and they are not afraid of being who they are. The next step of being with each other had a synergistic effect on our level of relating, socializing, and finally, drawing in other people.

Part of being a human being is to align ourselves with great friends, note that I didn't write being a leader of men. We are not there to "social proof" each other, but rather, social proof arises naturally out of we enjoying each other's company and having fun together. When I see pack of wannabe-PUA's (even ones at the intermediate level) constantly sharking any venue, part of me dies because I truly feel sorry for them. They don't bring something of value, friendship, to the group. So after you have done the requisite among of "sets" alone by yourself, and you can befriend almost any group of strangers and finally, cultivate a great cohesive group of friends. You are ready to go out and take over the venue... This is the first step toward World Domination.

If you still wonder what the first paragraph means, I might explain privately... Just as they were forwarded to me privately.

Friday, November 16, 2007

My personality

I've been busy with work and umm, girls. This is the result of a recent personality test that I took:

  1. Flexible temperament: Nothing seems to bother you - you sail through life crisis free. It's not that your life doesn't have its ups and downs, it's just that you handle everything without unnecessary drama and antics. You approach each day fresh, not worrying about yesterday or tomorrow. You are confident that you can handle anything that comes your way and experience has shown that you are absolutely right about this.
  2. Simple interests: You are continually pursuing a simpler and less complicated life - you don't allow yourself to fall victim to all of the "should do's" that society continually bombards you with. You are thoughtful about your life choices and think in terms of yourself, others and the world in which we live. You have a great sense that we are part of something much bigger and we must be good to others, if we want others and the world to be good to us.
  3. Adventurous amusement: It's a good thing that you are filled with energy and ambitions (that others sometimes find exhausting) because you're continually looking for a new adventure and exciting experience. You struggle with a continual feeling of restlessness which constantly pushes you to the next level of excitement. Once you have accomplished one thing, you are eager to accomplish something more exciting, riskier and distinguishable.
  4. Physical passion: You are a cuddle bug - from a warm hug shared with your best friend to steamy sex with your partner, you enjoy every bit of human contact that you can get. You demonstrate your love for others most fluidly through physical one-on-one contact and you feel the most loved when you are being touched. You feel disconnected when you are physically isolated from others. You're a people person and a lover of all things human.

Others have taken the same test and they didn't fit their test results at all... Oh well. Mine described me accurately.

Wednesday, November 14, 2007

Cooking under pressure

Many stressors in life are created internally. The whole approach anxiety is basically mental drama that people conjured up because of something else. Remember how you made friends in kindergarten? How is meeting a stranger any different now?! Most interactions go nowhere and that's quite alright... what bothers me lately is that day in and day out interaction, that gradually builds and sneaks up on me. I am having a difficult time dealing with the emotional impact of it.

The journey that I started over 1 year ago has gotten me quite far considering how much of a social retard I still am. From what I see, the effort of keep going pays off eventually. Beware of this...


Where am I now and where do I want to go... in terms of "pickup." I've been wrestling with these questions the past few days and I don't have any good answer. I'm happier than I was this time last year. I'm almost as happy as when I was in a very fulfilling romantic relationship previously. Partly, I am glad that I don't have to deal with those man-on-man dramas. Partly, I am relatively happy with my progress in field. Partly, I am juggling with some relatively successful relationships. The difficulty is answering the question: what is enough?

Tuesday, November 13, 2007

Don't be stupid

Even if I know Sinn's real name, which I do, why would I post it on here? I'm not going to divulge anyone's identity on here, I have done my best to conceal the real life identities of people (I know and those I don't), even those whom I find abhorrent. Stop doing silly searches and trying to mine for personal information about people here. Sheeesh. For all you know, what I write here might be completely fictional, don't bother trying... this is my blog, not the New York Times (or TMZ).

Monday, November 12, 2007

Converting cold approaches to more girls

There's a certain amount of thrills involved, and to constantly hone in our skills. There are also ways to exponentially expand our results of converting cold approaches into more girls. That is being social and bringing value to any interaction. How to have friends of girls literally hand them to you... how to expand the pool of women to pick from... finally having choice in who to spend our valuable time.

The reality is that girls always get invitations to events and of course, girls rarely go alone. The trick is to find a few girls who are socially connected, preferably single so they have plenty of guys going after them. Flirt with them, have fun, and definitely be social when I'm out with them, I even enlist them in picking up girls, uh, socializing with other people. They feed off my attention to them, in the process, girls have this inherent desire to feel connected and if we present ourselves as people who can do that, girls will naturally invite us along. There are some caveats though.

First, be sure to surround ourselves with socially savvy guys who are not horn dogs (again, no community guys, or guys who think they are total gamers and willing to bone anything with a hole). Definitely have friends who have values. Second, be sure befriend everyone, including their potential suitors, and the more we push girls toward these guys, the less attractive these guys become. The trick is more than leading, but to plant the seed in how nice these guys are and to sub-communicate their behaviors as needy, approval-seeking, creepy, low value, and thus, they are horn dogs without results. The double-bind is that these guys can't refuse compliments from us in front of girls, but in girls' eyes, they appear as weak because we are qualifying these guys... giving them approval (whether they were truly seeking it or not).

Finally, another important skill is to be able to hang out with other guys. When they feel that they can get girls through us, they will feel compel to hand their girls (they failed to get) to us. So always add value to any interaction. You never know how many girls will start calling you, or some how, magically ending up at your doorstep.

Sunday, November 11, 2007

Peeling off the layers

Getting girls at the bar, such as pulling them home, and even having sex with them that very night, is not a big deal! At any given bar, doesn't matter whether it's classy or not, there are plenty of girls who are out for sex... It's a numbers game. If we talk to enough of girls in there, lower our standards enough, we will get some that night. Is that worth it? Do we want to go out hunting night in and night out, every week? Or are having relationships (be they monogamous or not) more fulfilling?

Awhile back, I posted questions about identity and our purpose in life... those are the questions we all struggle with throughout our lives and raising those questions seems to trigger an almost universal response of, "OMG, someone who is going through the same turmoils as me." Sure, there are exceptions. For many people, they are like onions. They take time to peel through one layer after another, but there are some core questions that get at that very quickly. At the risk of sounding like a Mystery fan boy, his statement, "I didn't get an instruction book on how to live my life." It is vague enough, but also insightful enough to trigger that same universal OMG response.

Even though I use many community routines/techniques, I wouldn't consider myself a pickup artist, and I don't do pickup. What I do, however, is being social... being a normal human being. I don't belong to a special elite group of social retards. In fact, I make my interactions with girls so smooth, so fun, that they don't remember me how I #closed them and we might not have sex the same night we met, but we will keep on having sex for months afterward. One is to avoid state break and the other is strengthening that core emotional connection.

The way I avoid state breaks is to multi-thread. Stories stack on top of stories, conversational threads weave into another but they rarely finish, avoid the dreaded question train that goes after each bullet point in a resume, and always escalate, but not in a predictable way. Once girls accept that the interaction is like an emotional roller coaster, they will accept that they don't know what's coming because everything is sort of random and yet, but they continue to feel safe with me. That's how I build trust and comfort. Ways to create that randomness, and thus causing confusion, is to combine different techniques, push-pull, cat-string theory, microcalibration, rolling off, yin-yang,... "Bullshit baffles brain," as Lovedrop described.

Just as people are like multi-layered onions, conversational threads should be a tangled mess like a Gordian Knot, and interactions should allow us to connect at multiple emotions. Sure, there are simple routines to pump up buying temperature to overcome resistance or get girls to past compliance tests, and of course, sex is the final compliance test. What I am getting at is that each interaction should have this natural flow to it and routines can keep the inertia going, but much of it is improvisation, many market that as natural game, I personally prefer to call it organic game (tm). Think of trees, I defy anyone to find two identical trees, so interactions can be group into similar species, but they are rarely identical even though they have similar components, roots, leaves, branches, flowers, and seeds. After all that bullshit, even onions grow from seeds. (And yes, organic game is a subset of In-her game; for the humor impaired, it's a joke!)

Friday, November 9, 2007

Why stay away from community creeps?

For many lonely lovable losers, myself included, community seemed to be a way out. I thought I found the road to salvation, pulling and !closing HB9+ on a weekly basis. Unlike many in the community, without a career or hating their jobs, I like mine and wouldn't give it up for, hold on, just wait, get this, becoming a dating coach! The reality is quite different.

Let me recount some embarrassing stories while I was in "the community." Sorry, there were absolutely no spectacular pulls, no lays, no girls, nothing until I left "the community." Oh, stories... I was out the first time with a self-proclaimed top 10 PUA in the local community. He was walking around the club ALL NIGHT LONG with a sign "The S***** Lair" on his back. I thought it was a deliberate sign for other newbies to go meet up with him. As it turned out, he told girls that he's a Pickup Artist from THE LAIR, of course, one girl made a sign, taped on his back, tooled him, and allowed him to walk around like that. He couldn't even handle some light teasing from this girl later on that night. Did I mention he also told us that he was dating a stripper at the time? And guess where we found girls that he "dated," those girls are regular posters on Craig's List casual encounters.

Another community guy, I was doing the Mystery Newbie Mission with him. Now, this guy (at that time) already took 3 workshops / bootcamps (that he admitted to); he was into his 2nd or 3rd year within the community... and he was doing the Newbie Mission for the Nth time. I was stupid enough to think that it could change me. In the process, I met some normal people, they pulled me aside and asked me why I was hanging out with a weirdo, and countless times, girls would ask me if I'm gay (by association). Recently, I accidentally socialized with his former co-workers. They recounted stories of how anti-social he was at work while he (on the other hand) bitched about his shitty work conditions, and after they found out that I knew him, guess what they asked me, that's right, "Is [he] gay?" And yes, he's still trolling our local forum for newbies... to be, yes, his "wings."

Another self-proclaimed guru of the local community, he even formed his own exclusive fight club, created a pickup company, corralled together a few guys and even taught a few bootcamps. His students, to this day, are still haunting the same clubs/bars without any demonstrable results. His former partners abandoned him, he has since tucked tail and moved away (or so people told me). When I mocked him in our forum, his friend called him out, and so did many others who talked about him behind his back, he sent his minions to AMOG me! Where is he now? Where are his girls now? Where has he gone now?

If you think this is a phenomenon among the local community guys, a well-known pickup company came to town to teach a bootcamp and of course, the local lair president who is an aspiring dating coach (another addict to workshops & bootcamps) got to represent and assisted in coaching. Guess what happened, more than half of those students asked for refund. It would be easy to dismiss that, oh, this is a local city thing, as it turns out, I've talked with other guys, they have taken workshops at other cities, they too have asked for refunds. By the way, there's this silly post I made on here, apparently, it got to him so much, that whenever he comes to read this blog, he would read that entry. Again, so much for having experience, being alpha, authentic, leader of men, and whatever else.

There are more embarrassingly funny stories. When did I finally improve? When I stopped hanging out with these community social retards, all I did was that I went out by myself for 2-3 weeks. I made new friends, they invite me to events, we plan events together, and because I swallowed the red pill and unplugged from the community. I think there's more to learn from the community, but I would limit myself to the well known "gurus" and their "teachings"; but definitely NOT from "community guys." I will blog about what works and what doesn't based solely on my own experience.

Thursday, November 8, 2007

Beautiful simplicity

Thank you for your emails about how my life is without the community, I'm doing great not hanging out with community guys. Sure, I don't open as many sets and I don't get that many spectacular blow outs, repetitive rejections, or creeping girls out. I am so much happier, I have friends who are fun, living exciting lives, and socially well-adjusted. Funny enough, I also have plenty of female friends who come out to party not to "sarge." When we are out, we play pranks on each other... Other girls get involved, we don't need to run game because girls actually open us wondering what's going on. Unlike the countless community guys standing around observing us, as Mystery said, be the observed... not the observer.

The best part of being socially connected is that I get invitations to parties, events, and other activities without having to pay. No cover, no ticket to buy, and girls are so friendly without the awkward exchange of contact info. Better yet, there are no eager, horny, needy, and creepy community guys trying to come in. Being in a relatively small (big) city, girls told me countless stories about how many community guys failed to get them. This is usually after sex, when I debrief them and they ask me how I know those so-and-so weirdos. The sad truth is that most self-proclaimed PUAs (and community guys in general) don't get laid. And girls they have full montied are fat, culturally inept, mentally handicapped, have faces only their mothers would love, or any combination of above.

The better solution is to get out of the cesspool of social retards that many called the community, befriend with normal people, go out and be social. You will find your life much more rewarding without dealing with the general neediness of guys, you might even discover humor, something that would make people laugh their guts out without even faking a smile. Best of all, you won't be tempted by those gay gurus trying to get into your ass and your wallet at the same time. It's so great when people are up front with their intentions and we don't need each other for anything... we just be with each other because we are fun.

Wednesday, November 7, 2007

Unplugged from the community

The community is the matrix. Many in the community talk about society as the matrix and how joining the community is their moment of taking the red pill. The reality is that the community itself is the matrix, not the other way around. The matrix is powered by the hopes, dreams, and fantasies of these lovable losers. The best thing anyone in the community can do for himself is to leave the community once he has gotten the approach anxiety under control.

I've been discussing with friends about who get results, as in having sex regularly like normal people, the list of those in the community is short, quite short. In fact, I have a suspicion, the next scandal that will bust open this community will be similar to what happened to the Catholic Church in the last decade, that most guys in the community are closet gays. How any guy can develop the fear of girls is beyond me... Didn't we used to play with girls on the playground when we were kids? Didn't we grow up with friends, both guys and girls? Don't we live with and work with girls? How guys become such worshipers of women, I don't get it. I seriously didn't bother to rank girls on a 1-10 scale until I joined the community. Before, I had a very simple criteria, she's either fuckable because I'm attracted to her or she isn't; instead, guys in the community set up these artificial barriers so that they can measure, compare, compete with each other. Are they really that hard up for validation from each other, loveable losers?

Slowly but surely, I have gotten to know many guys in the community, I discovered how miserable they really are. They bitch and whine, but never take action to change their lives. They are obsessed with competing with each other, not in terms of actually getting girls, but more for attention from guys. Worst yet are those delusional enough to think that they can make money teaching people, to change lives of others, when they haven't done anything to improve their own. Of course, in order for them to maintain their reputations, they would embellish and even write up fake reports in order to garner attention (and again) from guys. They are more interested in dating, uh, sarging with each other than hanging out with girls! I mean, really, what are we in this for... more men or women?

At this point, I realized that I was better off going out alone, meeting people and befriending normal people. That's when I rediscover what the real society is like. There's no point in running game. I simply gave up gaming people. People started to invite me part of their groups, because I don't want anything from them, their attention, their approval, their attraction/IOI, their girls, etc, instead, I bring value, I am fun and social and connected. I'm also not so hard up about sex because it comes naturally whenever and wherever, without running awkward gambits. Yes, community routines work and I have fun running them, but in order to run them successfully, we simply can't be such try-hards.

For those who are still in the community after all these years and for those who obviously have no game, but are still trying to pretend to be dating coaches. Good luck! Because many people are wising up to their tactics in seducing guys. There will be more products, more techniques, more methods, more coaches, what we need is what we already have. The only way to get good is to have experience, and experience comes by going out, interacting with people, don't care about results, if and when something happens, great... otherwise, it's another fun night out with friends. You do have "friends" not just another newbie guy you met off the lair?!

Tuesday, November 6, 2007

Productivity

Laziness is a great virtue and I try my best to work as little as possible. Take the mouse for example, I think it's one of many productivity killers, and touchpad isn't far behind. Why? Because for a touch typist like myself, I have to lift my hand, grasp around for the mouse, move the pointer to the desired location, and then move back to my keyboard. The more efficient way is to keep my dominant/mouse hand on the keyboard and trackpoint is the most efficient way of moving the pointer around. My recent compromise on desktop computers is to use my trackball, then I know exactly where my pointer moving widget is without looking for it; the additional benefit is that a trackball doesn't take up the same amount of space as a mouse with its mousepad.

Along the same line, I use gmail and greasemonkey together, and I found gmail macros; it lets me navigate and perform various tasks inside gmail without using my mouse. I was just complaining to a friend of mine today after gmail upgraded to the new version.

It's just sooooo hard, you know, I want to quit my "miserable" job and do my 4-hour work week, be a dating coach every other weekend. Can someone make me dinner? Don't forget to pick up my dry cleaning too! While you are at it, bring a few girls home... so, you know, I don't have to go out and talk to girls. Living is so difficult! HA!

Sunday, November 4, 2007

Living the life

The compelling and captivating life that girls want to participate. Awhile back, I blogged about the reason that most guys failed to connect with strangers is not having a strong identity, and the ability to convey that as soon as possible to a stranger. Part of the character building process is through socialization... How to live a life that naturally draws in girls... How to get girls to see us again? How do we surround ourselves with happy, positive, fun, and social people?

The foundation of being a man is self-sufficiency, someone who can go out alone, befriend strangers and make new friends. This will take time, it will require courage, especially among guys within the community. The red pill these guys took to unplug from the matrix; they ended up inside a cramp, claustrophobic, rat-infested, of a vessel called the lair that is filled with money/power/fame-hungry societal rejects. The popular chorus among community guys, at least here, is that how this place sucks and they are moving away... the thing is, this false time constraint stopped working after they have been repeating it for over 1 year, and another thing, why bother to flip this attraction switch among guys? Unless these guys want to get with other guys.

When two strangers meet, all they have is being in the moment, what happened in the past is an unknown (so leave those baggages behind), and what will happen in the future has yet to be realized (so make an effort to create something better). Instead of being dissatisfied and malcontent, we are better off if we focus on the here and now. What can we do to make what and where we are better? Many of us improve by making incremental changes, not necessarily drastic changes or complain about our current condition, which will inevitably drive everyone away. Now that we covered what not to do... what can we do to cultivate a life that's inviting for new friends and being the hub for existing friends?

We must have a positive and healthy attitude about life and about each other. We must bring value to any interaction, any type of relationship; by that, everyone wants to be part of something, (why do you think lairs are so attractive for societal rejects?) so find out what is available locally, keep up with local events, call up friends (you do have social friends that you don't sarge with, I hope?), and go hang out and chill. In the process, make new friends and gradually connect people with each other, coordinate events/parties with each other, and naturally, people will contribute and invite us to even more events.

That's the gist of playing the social circle game. Don't be the crazed banter monkey, the weird opinion-seeking guy, the I-statement & open-ended questions weirdo, or the contrived false leader of men (like being a lame "lair president"). Be normal, be boring, be fun, be unpredictable, be social, and be in the moment.

Friday, November 2, 2007

Heroes

Heroes. Have you seen this tv show? What is with our obsession that we, as individuals, are somehow that special? That we are endowed with some secret superpowers. This reminds me of some individuals, especially among those in the community, that they think they have the secret, cracked the code, divorced from the matrix, and can manipulate/hustle other people.

That's one thing people in cults believe... and same with those in the secret society of the community. A friend just sent this article about "Ways the community can make you weird." What a well thought-out, balanced article! The one thing that article failed to address is what I have been harping, the overselling of simple ideas that most people already know, and guys are busy seducing each other instead of girls.

Thursday, November 1, 2007

What a blast!

This Halloween probably aged me several years! Damn, too much partying and I'm not sure I can handle the 3rd round of parties this weekend. Being here during the winter months can be depressing, and surprisingly, I am walking around with a smile all morning even though I'm dead tired. I can't imagine what I'd be like if I had more booze.

I was going to post something about starting my 99 lonely nights of winter. But I just can't, that would be lying when I am surrounded by so many happy people, going to parties without any community guys,... Ah, life is good!

Keep up the good work, guys! I'm going to take a break and give this a go in a few weeks (again and again)!

Are you kidding me? This is my only way of getting some more attention from guys... gay guys! I wouldn't give up blogging about social retards so easily.

Wednesday, October 31, 2007

Yes, I don't have to do the heavy lifting

I was just discussing this idea of mine of bringing all those (social & professional) networking sites together last week... Then this rumor appears. Just as there were many IM protocols back in the 90's. Now, we will probably have a networking site that will bring myspace, facebook, linkedin, whatever else together. I bet there will be one site for blogs too.

Stupid is as stupid does

Just to test out some copywriting techniques, and again, mostly for my amusement, I posted a fake advertisement for my very own workshop, just like my mockery of people's fixation with inner vs. outer game. The funny thing is that I am deluged with private messages about my ficitious workshop, even though I've been advising people not to take workshops from guys (myself included) who are not working for big name schools. Seriously, if our parents got together to create us without a workshop, do we (as their progenies) need to take workshops in order to get girls?!

Do we need to follow some arbitrary rules for approaching women, meeting women, getting women,...? How about we follow our fricking instinct? If we can't tell the difference between what is fake and what is real... what is the right vs. what is the wrong thing to do, we are not fit to procreate. Do we suddenly have a generation of idiots who suddenly don't know how to relate to each other? Do we need to read about this in blogs, form discussion groups, participate in email lists, and join a lair in order to get girls?

I have a very simple idea, how about we go out, talk to people, learn from our mistakes, our failures... Does this generation have so much disposable income that we want to create and cultivate a group of parasites, or as they refer to themselves, dating coaches, in this society? This whole obsession with trying to find an easy way out, a method to get girls, there simply isn't a substitute of just having the raw experience of interacting with people.

Funny how so many self-help gurus want to "help" people by selling more books, more workshops, more bootcamps, more methods, more techniques, etc. Whatever happened to the self in self-help? Take charge of one's life... sure we can use some advice here and there, at some point, people just need to give up trying quick fixes, start doing the hard work of changing oneself, and ultimately, and directly interact with people instead of surrounding ourselves with social retards. There will always be new techniques, more sale pitches, more door-to-door/used car sales people.

The only way to get good with people is by interacting with people. There's just no easy way around it. People should worry less about running game, we all should start by being normal, then learn to be social, and hopefully, we learn to get along with each other.

One clear sign of idiocracy is that community guys don't realize they are being hustled by the same techniques they are supposed to learn to get girls. This is the last time, the once in a lifetime opportunity, the only chance, and throw in a false time constraint or two. Guys with skills and good reputation don't need to stoop so low to market themselves on forums. Just word of mouth alone is enough is sufficient to make or break someone's career, especially those "dating coaches" who can't open or get blown out left and right.

Monday, October 29, 2007

Halloween 2007

The best part of having 10/31 in the middle of the week is having 3 times the number of parties: weekend before, middle of the week, and the weekend after!

Sunday, October 28, 2007

The wizard behind the curtain...

Perhaps I'm the only one, or may be not, that faithfully believed many pickup techniques and practitioners of those techniques to be true. There's a certain amount of admiration and after what happened recently, I am slowly beginning to see the light. And if people haven't noticed, this revolution of thoughts and skills has returned me to where I first started, and what everyone else (outside of the community) said before has turned out to be true.

Yes, there probably was a community of guys who weren't that socially savvy; they probably spent time out there socializing and figured out what works and what doesn't. Then marketing people discovered this group of guys who have some skills, and the marketeers hype them up to be superheroes, when these "amazing feats" are what normal, well-adjusted, social guys have been doing forever.

The magic isn't in the techniques, but in marketeers' ability to hype and sell these seemingly mundane social skills to be endowed with some magical powers to social retards, who obviously don't have the social intuition to figure out that these techniques aren't that special. What I find funny is that THE GUY who started mass marketing these pickup techniques (of being cocky & funny) has returned back to his root and now offers to teach his marketing techniques to his peers in marketing. This is the sign of the golden age of pickup techniques is ending because they have milked the market dry and the only route of expansion is back in marketing... to find the next niche of rich retards.

I had an inkling of what's going on last year with the mass marketing campaign for the Anal Method. Then I got to meet some dating coaches, sure, they were somewhat smooth, but I didn't see what they claimed to happen in their "reports." Most were just guys out talking to people and most conversations didn't go anywhere. Then recently, some people showed me videos of these secret "edited" footages of sarges by these gurus (including that of the World's Greatest Pickup Artist), I finally see that this has all been a big marketing hype.

Without a doubt, my life has changed since I've been out socializing with people. I now have more friends than ever, more social events to attend to than before, more girls than I thought possible. In terms of the time and money that I've spent, and unlike many who have taken countless workshops, which I've always been skeptical, is it worth it? Not really. All those workshops, techniques, can be distilled into a few things someone can do... and these are basically what people have been saying all along, the problem is that they didn't elaborate on what they mean, and I will blog my interpretations of these sayings:

  1. Be yourself
  2. Have fun, live life to the fullest
  3. Be social, surround yourself with good people

That's it... There's no need to buy the latest, greatest, one-time-only, final workshop... the last brain transplant... the final weekend before I leave to bum around in the next town... and you certainly don't have to leave me any unmarked envelope with cash, because who would want IRS to start snooping into this type of unreported income?!

And yes, this Halloween has been amazing! I was among friends, met some cool new people, and I'm sure the next one will be even better. Sorry, I won't post any embellished report because most of my interactions are like this.

Saturday, October 27, 2007

Breakthrough her bitchshield and drop her panties with your

Strong identity. Part of being a man, having a strong frame, is to have a strong identity and the ability to convey that quickly. People, guys in particular, often complain about girls having a bitchshield and whatever freeze. Anyone who has done a cold approach on a super hot girl has experienced the FMR, first minute resistance, approach anxiety (and yes, for many, they never progress past this first sticking point). Girls experience something similar; they want "to get" the identity of the stranger on first glance so she can decide quickly whether she likes him or not,... This is why peacocking, great body language, and a few other tidbits are necessary to make that first impression .

First impression matters a great deal... There are two main ways of conveying it through identity. First, and if you can withstand social pressure, peacock to resemble any of the sexy stereotypes. I've discussed this previously in regards to how looks are important and having a sense of fashion. Being able to deal with stares and shit tests is a good sign that someone is comfortable with himself. The second way of conveying identity is through story telling... We all play multiple roles in our daily lives. The basic ones (for guys) are: friend, son, ex-bf, brother, father, uncle, and other professional roles. Incorporate these identities into stories. The goal of a good "pickup" interaction is to move from situational, to our mutual social roles/contexts, to our personal and finally, sexual topics.

For many girls, when a stranger starts talking to them, they wonder who he is. For many guys who haven't assumed a certain authoritative role in their lives, they don't know how to present themselves. So they follow the cocky&funny and come across as someone trying to hide something. The problem, once again, stems from guys not being themselves and girls can sense that. Being ourselves, in women's speak, means having an identity, immunity against social pressure, willingness to throw it out there without exhibiting any hint of approval seeking behavior.

Girls really don't have any bitchshield; they are just reserved, especially with guys who dress conservatively and don't convey a strong sense of identity in their presentation (body language, clothes, looks,...). But then there are also guys who seem cool, until they open their mouths and dispel all doubts. So both verbal and non-verbal "games" are critical. Just as non-verbal game goes beyond just body language, verbal game goes beyond just routines to "spike her buying temperature." Being genuine is about being comfortable with oneself, and having the ability of telling people who we are (directly or indirectly), our identities.

Wednesday, October 24, 2007

More sex, less drama

People are so obsessed with what goes on in the heads of others. The reality is that nothing matters as long as we have fun with friends or alone. If we are to interview guys with experience vs. newbies who just starting to go out and socialize, it's not about body language, lines, openers, routines, cocky & funny, humor, etc. It basically comes down to one thing...

Just as I started this blog because I needed a place to vent, and even to this day, I still blog plenty of rants and raves... basically bitch sessions about certain people, types of people, techniques, ideas, and situations. Oh, that one thing that people should live by, DO NOT GIVE A SHIT. Before people run away and act gay toward each other, such as telling ea other that they are cute, forming circle jerks to talk game, please be somewhat normal and social first. There is a fine line between not having a care in the world and knowing when that's appropriate.

Take the initial approach, for example, guys would run their openers and stacks of materials, and they would look for IOIs, IODs, and DHV in order to elicit IOI, or microcalibrate, roll-off, and whatever else to IOD. The only thing that matters is that she reacts in some way, it doesn't matter if she reacts positively or negatively... the only bad reaction is no reaction. Otherwise, roll with what she gives and continue with having fun, better if we are having fun at her expense. Guys fail only because they can't be themselves, by that, they are not comfortable within their own skins, desires, and intentions. They have some agenda of wanting or needing something from someone.

I started this blog because I feel like bitching... and I like to make fun of social retards in the community, especially those without game pretending to be gurus after failing all these years, or worst yet, dating coaches, they don't matter because they won't make money off me nor do I want to make money off others. Unlike countless hustler-wannabes, this is what I do for fun, and I keep working at my professional career so that I can continue to do this for fun. I could careless if people think I have game, because ultimately, I don't want any fame or fortune from rejects of society. It's worst than robbing candies from children or raping underage girls (like many purportedly do).

That's the beauty of life; eliminate desires, life is much more enjoyable. Shut out people with drama within themselves or with each other, do as little as possible to maintain a comfortable living, avoid doing things in order to get something or someone, and be at peace with oneself.

For those who are avid readers of this blog, thank you, you probably know by now that this is a toxic waste dump for me: the sewer line that is often clogged with my mental sewage. Sure, once in a while, some gems or valuables would slip and flow through here. Most of the time, this is the raw, adulterated, crude, and mostly honest crap here. So find a channel to let it all go, and live a peaceful, fun, and socially active life.

Tuesday, October 23, 2007

Being a POOOO-AH!

Look at what’s happened to me,
I can’t believe it myself.
Suddenly I’m up on top of the world,
It should’ve been somebody else.

Believe it or not, I’m walking on air.
I never thought I could feel so free.
Flying away on a wing and a prayer.
Who could it be?
Believe it or not it’s just me.

It’s like a light of a new day,
It came from out of the blue.
Breaking me out of the spell I was in,
Making all of my wishes come true.

Believe it or not, I’m walking on air.
I never thought I could feel so free.
Flying away on a wing and a prayer.
Who could it be? Believe it or not it’s just me.

You know the standard song, Wagner's The Bridal Chorus, for weddings. The theme song to the Greatest American Hero should be played at the end of every divorce!

Funny how we are synchronized

I've been spending most of my time learning to format my, uh, "book." Office products have so many limitations. Even a simple task like setting page numbers in different parts of the same document requires so much work! And then Excel, I have programmed in VB before, and I try my best to avoid it. There are so many inconsistencies in how Microsoft decided which is a normal and a meta-character. Although my worksheet looks whacked, I like how I have combined my daily journal and financial activities together. You don't think I actually talk about my entire life here, do you?!

After I finished all that, yeah, I spent nearly 6 hours on those two things today. I read Twitchy's blog about managing one's finance. It's definitely one area that MANY people neglect, especially girls. I have seen girls who have great jobs for just graduated, as in making $80-90k, they are carrying balance of $20-30k on their credit cards, not to mention student loans, car loans,... For many of these girls, they get a new dress whenever they go to a new party, which happens 2-3 times per week. How will they get their lives together and be self-sufficient without carrying all those debts and start earning some passive and investment-based incomes. Yes, I do have the millionaire mindset; just not at leeching off the community like many "dating coaches."

With each successive wave of newbies into learning pickup, I see so many guys who don't have jobs, hold jobs, or properly manage their finances. Some even live with their parents, don't own cars, and/or can't drive. And they want to take girls home?! I figured early on back when I started college, girls are an expensive hobby. Dating can be quite costly, even if we stick to the $40/date (after splitting the bill), and multiply by that by 3-4 dates per week. This, of course, doesn't include when I go out with friends on weekend. On top of all this, there's the physical wear and tear too. We have to eat right and exercise; all those happy hour food and post-midnight meals/snacks are not good for our bodies either. This is especially true for guys getting girls off Craig's List who end up being sick all the time from "kissing girls;" like that's a DHV! The second I sense that I'm not feeling well, I immediately do what is required to get better... getting ill or any type of STD is not a DHV, it's a clear sign of stupidity, uh, in PUA lingo, DLV.

Funny how social retards turn everything that's socially unacceptable and wrong into something to brag about. Keep telling me those funny stories, I enjoy laughing as much as the next guy at dumb asses, now that I don't hang out with them anymore.

Saturday, October 20, 2007

Your life is already over before you live it

There's a huge uproar recently over some comments by Dr. James Watson, the co-discoverer of the double-helix model of DNA, regarding the genetic basis of intelligence. For those who don't know much of him, he is a Nobel-laureate, unlike his other co-discoverer however, Francis Crick, many consider Watson as a one-trick pony. He hasn't broken new ground in science since his discovery back in 1953. With that aside, is there a genetic basis of intelligence?!

Oh, one more thing, this is my blog, i.e. a place for me to rant and rave, definitely not a place for any legitimate scientific discussion nor a place for me to give my professional opinion. With all those caveats, we start with the premise that our genes determine much of our physical characteristics. What about the something where the result is the interaction of nature and nurture, such as our longevity. As that turns out, the best predictor of how long we live is also based on how long our parents lived, so again, something heritable, and most likely, genes.

I personally think those who are so politically correct to say that there are more variations between individuals of the same race than differences between races are morons. If genes can determine our skin color, and countless other physical characteristics, I can only guess that our genes also determine our intelligence capacity. Note that I'm not saying one race is smarter than another, because we can bias tests to get the result we want. All I'm saying is that we are different, and our differences are determined mainly by our genes.

How is this related to pickup/seduction? Genetics can play a major role from our looks, intelligence, to our behaviors. Sure, we can learn, but I would contend that our genes already set the upper and lower bounds on our capacity to learn. Consequently, how well we do is pretty much set in advance... Some people are destined to be stars and for many, their lives serve as warnings to others.

This constant need/drive for self-improvement doesn't benefit those who seek it; perhaps a few people do improve, but for the rest, they serve to enrich scammers: dating coaches, teachers of seduction workshops/classes, forum leaders, and in many cases, gurus. Step back and ask ourselves a simple question, if they are sooooooooo successful at what they do, do they need to hype themselves that much in order to sell their service to us?! I'm not even that successful in my real profession (outside of this fun social activity), but I don't feel the need to whore myself out on my own blog.

If we truly want to change our lives, the best way to do it to commit ourselves to do it, be that alone or otherwise. We should learn from those who have proven themselves. And finally, surround ourselves with those who are successful, not those who are still in the same place as they have been in years... which means, avoid forums and those who have been there forever, the longer they are there, they are more detrimental to our success. Those who are truly successful are recognized, they don't need to give themselves titles: PUA, top 10 PUA, ambassador of their tribes, lair president, forum guru, dating coach,... if only they would just admit what they really are: losers. And yes, they will forever be that way, because of their genes.

Thursday, October 18, 2007

Anything for a laugh

Allow me to be Yoda-like, you know why community guys fail at pickup? They take what "normal people" do for fun too seriously, which leads to expectation, expectation leads to neediness, neediness leads to creepiness, and creepiness drives girls away!

I have a tendency to see the humorous side of things, perhaps due to my professional training, I'm just skeptical in general. And yes, I'm suspicious too! When I first started blogging here, I made one post that got this one particular guy so worked up that to this day, he's still going back and re-reading that one post. Forward 7 months to now, someone told me he started posting again, and sure enough, there was a hit from his new city to read that very post on the same day of his new post. If there's one thing I like about community guys, I find their inability to change or improve very reassuring. It's almost like telling the same joke to a retard over and over again, and s/he still finds it funny.

Take the case of that social retard. He thinks this could be his future career as a dating coach with a ready and captured audience. Little did he know that most retards that he "leads" also doubt his ability. But he already had the expectation of everyone will follow lock steps with him, thus the second someone stepped out of his column, this retard freaked. He posted inflammatory statements, created multiple accounts, read people's "private messages," tracked anyone who he thought were suspicious in what they post or vote,... This continues from one anointed successor to the next. Yes, the line of social retards has yet to be interrupted and I hope it continues because where will I get my laughs.

Expectation leads to neediness, which he was, and his neediness eventually drove his only girl away (probably with his tears! EWWW!) and then, he had to move away. Sure, there are plenty of excuses, guys in the community are great at coming up with them. Once again, they prove that they don't change, they are great at doing the false DHV, of talking great game, goals of doing this and that to impress girls, and at the end of the day, they have forgotten to be a normal human being, a social creature that can get along with others without wanting something from people. I guess their desire to get laid, get girls, or guys, is so strong, that even they can't think or be straight.

Finally, a better writer wrote what I wanted to say:

"You want to be weird in the best ways imaginable, cool in ways particular to you, and normal enough to get yourself in the door."

Monday, October 15, 2007

Vulnerabilities vs. Insecurities

My previous blog entries poked fun at inner game, because quite frankly, I agree with Mystery, all those confidence building exercises are bullshit. Success in the field is dependent on how hard people work (along with all my previous caveats), if not, they will end up going home to work on their hardness, alone. Another thing I poked fun at previously was the reframing bullshit. I don't have problem with the concept, but more of its perversions by social retards.

Let's clear up a few things first for those who emailed / IM'ed / phoned / conversed with me in person, I don't have problems with what is taught in the community, by guys we all know and respect, this is by no means a comprehensive, all inclusive list: Mystery and Juggler. All my previous rants were directed at guys who are pretenders, hustler-wannabes, yet-another-dating-coach, copycats, plagiarizers,...

Back to the subject of this entry. I notice the main cause of inner game problem stems from guys trying to hide their insecurities instead of truthfully revealing them as vulnerabilities. Start with the approach, most guys are afraid of rejection, as do I. That's why we hesitate. The way I "reframe" it as having fun and being social, so I talk to everyone, she is just one of many girls I talk to. If nothing came of it, no big deal.

Which leads to the second problem, elicitation and counting of IOI's. As long as she's next to us, that's sufficient interest. We don't have to doubt who we are and just accept the fact, at least at our current level, not all girls will be interested, in fact, we should decide what kind of girls we want rather than feeling inadequate about who/what we are. The third problem is the failure to connect, because guys, especially those who got into this because of David D; they are so focused on being cocky & funny, teasing, engaging in endless banterrhea (you know the type, they shout gayass lines like, "YOU ARE SOOOOOOO CUTE!" to each other). In fact, I would constantly test the water but dragging the girl into talking about vulnerabilities, giving her the opportunity to share rather than shutting her up with more C&F teases.

One critical transition point is that as soon as we exchange names, I would immediately talk about something emotional for me recently. Don't be a hater, but I can think of two jobless friends; they bring up their unemployment in their normal conversations with girls all the time, and do you think girls run away? The trick is how they turn what is something all guys are insecure about, especially those computer programmers, these friends of mine don't have any job, and girls love how they are on these soul-searching existential quests! As I alluded to earlier, how I sometimes tell girls that I'm still working toward something greater, not that I am already settled at a job I like.

The three identity questions that I posted here before... Although I have some vague answers for them, those questions are something I forsee myself constantly changing and evolving new answers for the rest of my life, and probably the same with others. Feel free to bring them up in conversation, probably not in the beginning, but definitely right after we have discovered why we should like her (not just because of her look). My level of game has not evolved to the point where I can close the deal that night, but I am quite solid in terms of leading up to relationships if I don't fuck up along the way. I suspect that is due to my ability to show my vulnerabilities rather than hiding them as insecurities. Guys, who hide their intentions, are creepy and girls can tell right away. So if you have trouble opening, hooking, connecting, and maintaining relationships with people in general... ask yourself these questions, do I have something to hide? Am I honest with myself? With others? I'll probably have more bullshit to say as soon as I finish "Radical Honesty."

Sunday, October 14, 2007

Guess who?!

Credit to Possibility for discovering this... Who could he be?

And for those who still are sucking it up out there... after all these years:

Thursday, October 11, 2007

What this blog is all about...

A friend of mine told me about this book a few months back and I still haven't read it yet: Radical Honesty. Then this article on Captain Jack's blog reminds me of it, and it was a fun read! If everyone was more honest toward each other, then we can skip the bullshit and get back to being humans. This fits well with something I've been thinking about... how people hide their insecurities instead of revealing them for what they are, as vulnerabilities. The former is creepy and the latter is surprisingly attractive, to girls!

The loser mindset

I'm having a blogger block. There are so many things I want to write about, I've started writing a few entries and I couldn't bring myself to finishing them. Blogging interruptus.

For those who have read Joseph Campbell and been captivated by the Star Wars saga, we all appreciate how a young boy grows up to be a super hero. Now with MTV, VH1, Craig's List, and most importantly, seduction lair. I can write a whole book on the 'modern day' hero's journey: of people craving for fame, seeking out companionship online, and ultimately, ending up as seduction forum gurus. I wouldn't want to write such a story without donation, because I have the Millionaire Mindset. But, I don't have a paypal account for you to anonymously donate money to help fund my adventure.

Money is NOT evil. We just happen to have gullible people. I can write about how a virgin, who has no friend, found an online forum, read & memorized all that was in there, and rose up to lead a group of sargers. Or another loser, who is so insecure that he decided to flaunt his weakness until someone poke fun at him, he lost it and threw a series of childish tantrums. Or another virgin, who is living at home, a textbook example of awkward, feels so insecure about himself that he takes on the role of being the leader of, I know what you are thinking, and no, not that at all, deviants. Or another hustler-wannabe, who found out that there are so many wealthy gullible losers, starts turning tricks for the said forum of deviants.

Sadly, I have a blogger block. So I can't post all those stories publicly. I'm so sorry. If you subscribe to my private blog, you can read all about them!

Wednesday, October 10, 2007

One year later, life of a normal & social guy

One year ago, I was so out of touch with humanity. I was busily doing my "newbie mission" so that I could change to be someone more social, instead, it was more of a death spiral into a potentially life-long loneliness. Thankfully, I have broken free of that silliness and I now have fun being among normal and social people. The one thing I learned, as a friend of mine said it best, "Joining the community is like going to college, the goal of getting in is to get out as soon as possible." There are some great techniques, wonderful ways of connecting with people, but the worst part of it are people in it.

For this Halloween, I'm almost back to where I started before I joined the community. I've been invited to more Halloween parties than I know what to do... there is a readily a group of friends who I can call up to hang out. We have more fun by ourselves than most community guys out "sarging." I don't need to "sarge" any set, I'm just social and talk to people. Sure, I use community materials and routines, not because I need that to interact with people, because I enjoy being a dick just to mind fuck people. In retrospect, I cringe thinking of the weird, creepy, anti-social things I did with community guys. I'm happy they are still at it; they are the living proof that some people can't change. There are very few wonderful people in it. They all are doing the same thing, distancing themselves from the lair/community.

Guys in the community brag about pulls, day2's, ONS/SNP/SNL, whatever as though they need to pin medals on their heartless and soul-less corpse in order to feel good about themselves. They then post these FR/LR in the lair to boast their prowess. The reality is that normal people are having fun, being social, and having more sex than these social retards. The thing is, I should have followed my gut feelings when I first joined, I was reading all these reports and guys talked about these amazing feats of taking girls home... Then I thought back to my normal house mates, they were doing that regularly, so what's the big deal?!

After nearly 12 months of being active in the community, I finally recognized it for what it is, bunch of losers who will never be anyone or anything in life but they are busily seducing each other. Sarges are nothing but dates among guys: awkward moments of silence punctuated with brief interlude of terror/fear of what to do next, e.g. that one guy has to "open a set," grasping at straws to find commonalities among guys who have no personalities nor identities, no sense of fun or adventure, quietly trying to outmaneuver each other to "DHV" to each other while missing the goal of being a normal & social human being, and worst of all, they don't even realize how they have fallen off the social grid with the rest of humanity.

If people want to do Mystery's newbie mission, go out alone and learn to approach strangers, develop the social intuition so that you have the ability of befriending anyone. Either create or participate in many social circles of normal people, i.e. non-community people because community guys are deviants. There's nothing to be proud of to be a "gamer," not everyone needs to be gamed, it's quite alright to have boring normal conversations instead of running routines or conversation tactics on every one. Give up the hope of being a horn dog who tries to game and then fuck anything that moves.

Create the life you want to have, be yourself; yes, just like countless others have said before. If you can't be yourself, then figure yourself out: (1) who am I? (2) what do I want to do with my life? (3) how do I fit in with everyone else? If your answers are: I'm a PUA, I want to be a dating coach, and I want to make money teaching people to be social even though I don't realize that I'm not social. Unless you ALREADY are a big name seduction guru who is doing this professionally, you've already missed the boat, it's too late to jump on this bandwagon, you probably don't have anything new to teach... go shove a traffic cone up your ass, yes, you just might have discovered something you like. We have enough parasites in this world.