Cunts’n'Cocks: Leaks in the firewall

How much effort do we spend in partitioning our lives into separate compartments? Especially when one overflows or leaks into another, how much can we do to remedy that situation? Or in other words, how many balls can we juggle before one or more will fall through?

I told my bro that my ex-gf basically managed most of the transactions in getting my new house, this is on top of managing her full time job (and employees), her houses, her tenants, and her business. He was surprised how someone can take on so many roles and do them all at the same time. Then shortly after, she called me and expressed how she is stressing out. I can feel the weight of responsibilities falling on her shoulders and that’s tough for a single girl who is about to join the Christmas Cake Club.

Soon after that, I got a call from a girl I dated awhile back. I am doing the ethical thing to help as I have no one to answer to except myself. The most difficult thing is to be honest with myself, and after that, being honest toward others is a cakewalk. In any case, I hope her situation improves as life is as unfair as it is and despite we have walked our separate ways, I still do what I can professionally to make her situation tolerable. Everyone will experience it at some point in their life, hopefully later than sooner.

Being the selfish prick that I am, I thought about myself and how I deal with my stressors and the multiple roles I have to play. After a long discussion with a friend about some other issues, I realized how high and thick of firewalls I have built to partition my life into neat little compartments. In some weird psychological drama, I seemed to have created schizms in my persona that may be impeding my progress.

The question becomes, should I let my guard down, let a few balls dropped, and allow some mixing of different parts of my life? A friend once told me that I blocked out much of the pain and suffering I’ve experienced, which allowed me to keep going, fully functional in my professional capacity. However, in my personal life, I seem to come across as an empty shell, without the drama and emotional turmoils that give people character.

The real conspiracy

Back when I first started running (what I thought was) Mystery Method style, indirect opinion opener, I creeped out 2 girls. That got me back to the drawing board and learned about BL, opening techniques, walk, and a bit style, from Lance Mason of PU101. Then I discovered their programs: Art of Attraction, Art of Rapport,…

Now they have Art of Seduction, along with many other specialized workshops, like Advanced Tactics, pulling girls home the same night, etc. I think the final program should be Art of Everything (A.R.S.E.) The sad part is, all of these “arts,” that they are just breaking bits and pieces of what Mystery described in his M3 model: Attraction, Comfort, and Seduction. I don’t know of what his “New Model” will be, I doubt that it will be that much different. Even the new TMM added one is the “Transition” right after the opener.

Yes, there are other b.s. terms that other schools use like Natural game, Advanced Seduction,… I personally will start an all-Natural, organic, pesticide, herbicide-free, no children were harmed, The Omega Man method. It will start with,

1. Styles of attraction


2. Secrets of rapport


3. Sins of seduction

Come on, guys! If you actually believe that shit, you are fricking high. This is all about fun and games!

FR: How NOT to sarge the bartender’s gf

Be forewarned, this is my first FR. I’m the product of MM, PU101, Juggler, and my personal experience. To start with, I winged with this friend of mine for over 6 months, tonight was the first time he was able to #closed this hot Brazillian girl for day2. We had some good sets before, but never this chilled, at eased, and totally smooooooth. You owe me one! Afterward, he fell back into his rut of leaving early, another friend came just in time so I had an excuse not to talk to girls. Until we argued and I left to get some water,…

There was this hot girl sitting at the bar with this guy. The proper procedure was to open the guy, who had on a green t-shirt, thick golden neck chain, and grilles with ices, which I did by complimenting him for being the pimp. She was into it and I couldn’t get a straight answer what their situation was, so I just assumed he’s an orbiter, even though she was kino’ing him like crazy, but in my mind, I was there to befriend him.

Once the initial awkward stranger talking mode subsided, I asked her a few OEQ’s which she responded. I immersed myself into her answers and related my experiences, stories in life, some exaggerated, some not, that were comparable with the emotional undertone of her statements. She talked briefly about her non-traditional education, rather than busting her with C&F (as David D would recommend), I related her education with a deep emotion of how we struggle with conformity and our yearning to be free. I also spiked in a few subtle neg, such as how her handmade necklace out of some vines reminded me of how my 4-yo niece loves to make necklace out of beads.

As I learned and discussed in my previous rapport blogs, I kept taking her on an emotional journey, of deep and wide emotions to the point where she bought me a drink. Her female roommate came and they went off their discussion. In between her trying to get me involved into their interaction, I threw in a few routines, attraction type, to basically take control of the group to the point her male friend and female roommate had to talk, and I could engage her back in our emotional journey.

The point where the set hook was when she told me the guy serving us drinks was her bf. I tried my bf-destroyer routine and with some more rapport, she revealed the cracks in their relationship and how they don’t have the discussion we were having! Then she and her roommate went off for a smoke. I went and look for my friend who I had that argument, yeah, guys can have drama too!

As I returned, I noticed another guy was talking to the 2 girls, while they were smoking. I went in with some brief attraction materials and befriended the guy; somehow that triggered those two girls decided to go to restroom (why?) and my target insisted that I wait for her b/c I owe her a drink. So I opened that guy and his friends, chit chat, low energy conversation until the girls’ return.

My target took my arm and insisted that I buy her shot (as I agreed to buy the 2nd round for us). We did our shot and related some more, I suspect her roommate got the hint or was bored, so she left. Then my target went into this long ass story that she basically DHVed herself (for you MM guys, we were way into A3/C1). Back in my head, I started scheming for a good reason for us to meet up again. I false time constrainted that I need to join my friend and we should exchange contact info to do our activity. She objected in front of her bf, the bartender about 2 feet away, so I suggested and she complied by punching in my number into her phone and calling me.

Afterward, we talked for another 20 minutes, I kino pinged her, she was definitely a touchy-feely girl. As I was standing up and about to leave, her bf told me that I was talking to his gf, why he waited up until that poitn to tell me? I don’t know.

Break-thoughs:

1. Rapport through emotional journey
2. Cut routines down to < 10% of time spent
3. Get more by doing less, give her the opportunity to talk and spike in a few attraction stories and routines to sustain her momentum
4. Sarge a mixed 2-set at the bar, the bartender’s gf, without a wing

Need help in:

1. Escalate the interaction by taking the emotional journey toward sex
2. Bounce or venue change her
3. A more solid close

The music of Gen-X

My first serious gf introduced me to Alanis Morrissette; don’t laugh, the Jagged Little Pill! Watching this new video brings back memories…

Preventing the Peter principle of PU

Several readers of our forum messaged me about my post regarding Sinn’s statement that 90% of guys going into this community will NOT get good. That was a wakeup call for me to evaluate my progress and it struck a chord among many. Where do those guys who never get good go? I suspect that they constitute the majority of members in most “seduction” forums.

From reading posts in several forums and getting to know a few members, I realize that most participants of forums can be broken down into 2 groups: (1) Keyboard jockeys, and (2) Guys who prey on (1). Why they are there? The ecology of seduction forums fosters an environment that isn’t supportive of guys who want to improve, but to keep guys who have petered out.

I’m quite sure that many seduction forums started with the main altruistic goal of helping guys improve their social skills, their lives, so that they have choice with women. As these forums age, who will have time and money to support them? In fact, most of us met in another forum and decided to leave it because it was neglected. And in order for these forums to exist and self-sustaining, how will we prevent the creeping commercialism? In addition, guys who became good moved on because there’s no incentive for them to stay: more time for pussies or dorky guys? Not a tough question to answer!

Then who stay behind? Guys who are trying to garner ego trips or to hustle a few easy bucks. When we formed this forum, we wanted to create something that will motivate guys to be good. Assuming some of us will be good, how will we keep those guys who became good around? How will we keep guys who are good instead of guys who just getting stuck at this? How will we call out guys who are in this for the ego trips when they obviously got no game?

Seducing men

I can’t believe I’m telling you this…

This will only take a minute.

Give a man a girl, he’ll be happy until she dumps him. Teach a man how to get any girl, he’ll be happy for the rest of his life.

The caveat is that all seduction schools promise to teach guys the latter. How many actually attempt to do that? And how many actually succeed in teaching that knowledge?

Ladies men have existed ever since there are ladies. This is nothing new. We all think that there’s a short cut, one workshop, one bootcamp, one method , one guru that will lead us to salvation. Well, there isn’t. Guys who promise an easy fix are selling snakeoils.

I would contend that most guys who teach this are better at seducing men than women. They make men feel that they are (1) worthy (2) ready to take this power back from women (3) capable of having “hot babes” and 3somes. Guess what? I have seen quite a few guys going into this… Most dabble and by joining a lair, they think they will be good. 90% of the journey doesn’t begin with the first step, in fact, 1% of the journey begins with joining the community. 99% of the journey involves learning by making mistakes, no one there will be holding our hands or console us when some girls give us shit.

After we started to look AND act normal, the next step is to play the number game. Most dating coach will teach us about spitting game and try to convince us that’s enough, as though you can hear drops of her wetness hitting her panties as you do your silly games. You won’t. Running games isn’t enough; most women aren’t right for us, nor are we right for most women. Say we have a 1 in a 1000 chance of finding the right girl, if you start talking to many women, the chance of finding her is the same, however, by probability alone, you might find that one after you’ve talked to 1000 girls. If you don’t play and start talking to women, you won’t find that 1.

Even the best naturals get rejected, they just learn to filter that out and only focus on the positives. Most dating coaches fail just as much as any guy, they just won’t remember or admit to that. By focusing on the positive results, that’s how they get motivated and can overcome their rejection. I suspect most of them, especially ones that are jumping into this recently, are in this to make money off us, not because of their prowess in getting girls, but in their ability to find weak men to pay for their sorry ass, because they certainly aren’t making enough in their real job.

The only way to be better is by committing to it, then grow some balls, have thick skin to face rejection, and stop hitting up on men to boost your egos or line your pockets (yes, this is for those try to be “dating coaches” when you got no game; there might be one bald PUA, and you are not him). One more thing, this game is played for years, very few if any bona fide PUA settles into a relationship with one girl after dabbling int this for a few months.

Remember, 99% of the journey lies ahead of joining the community and 90% of guys fail. Are you strong enough to be that 10%?

The in-her game(tm): Rapport redux

This weekend has been amazing. We all have the ability to heal ourselves; at a later point, I will write a simple intro on our immune system where our body can protect and heal ourselves biologically. For now, I’m going to dive right in and discuss my emotional journey this weekend that led me to this amazing insight.

First, I want to revisit two topics about emotional connection, i.e., rapport, that I didn’t explain clearly in my last post. Imagine our emotional self has both breadth and depth, a simple analogy would be like the ocean.

We can skim the surface, bouncing from point to point without diving in and exploring the depth. That is what is meant by wide rapport, where we explore many emotions without much depth, finding commonalities, not just what we do, but how we feel about certain topics. To get at this, a simple exercise I will do is to write down my list of likes and dislikes (food, music, family, work,…) and to things I start to riff off based on keywords. The goal is to go as far and wide, to visit as many emotional places as possible without depth.

The other way is to dive in and explore the depth of the ocean at a particular emotion. Different emotions have various depths; after navigating through them, deep rapport is about picking a deep emotion and dive right in where we re-live that emotional experience and to make sense of it so that it doesn’t exist like the monster underneath our bed, or like a festering wouldn’t heal. The exercise for deep rapport is to list multiple deep emotions, then think back of a time in our lives where we either first experience that emotion (which is always life changing) and/or that emotional experience has a major impact on who we are.

The sharing of emotional journeys, be they deep, wide, or preferably, both like a roller coaster, is not only therapeutic for the sharer, it also builds a connection and cements the bond between people. Remember when you were a child, how you love bed time stories? Even as adults today, we still like to hear stories. The best stories are not just facts, but they have the emotional impact, that is what we like because we get to re-live them and also we get to know about the person telling those stories.