Friday, December 28, 2007

Cultivating a core group of friends

After all my bashings of the community, 2007 has been my turning point, away from the community and rejoin the normal humanity. Instead of amassing, reading, watching, listening to more community bullshit, then get on "seduction forums" to mentally masturbate with other keyboard jockeys, I went on an almost weekly diatribe about the evil of these forums and most of their participants, which inevitably drove most of these losers out of my life.

My view is still the same, some of the materials are good, but only from well known established guys, the rest is just copycat. Most participants in seduction forums are losers, the longer they are on them, the more likely they are failures, not just in getting girls, but in life. The best way to learn is still to go out alone, befriend people, cultivate a core group of friends, not just to go out and pick up girls, but people who are reliable, trustworthy, social, fun, you know the term that "AFCs" called, "friends."

I didn't realize how far I have steered off the normal path by community losers until girls asked me why was I surrounded by creepy, socially awkward losers. Then I re-examined my relationships with these losers, and there is definitely something off about them. They simply don't know how to maintain friendship. They are so obsessed with pursuing fame and/or fortune by cannibalizing each others. Sure, there is still friction with friends, but we have fun together, we rely on each other, we help each other, many of these social skills that these losers don't have. Sadly, no amount of workshops, newbie missions, bootcamps, wings, forums, and whatever else will instill in them a sense of humanity.

The blatant marketing ploys of selling more materials and workshops continue, but there is a trend toward cooperation between these vultures. Guys who aren't so good would "DHV" each other by vouching for each other. They also talk about the higher purpose of helping men, improving lives of many. I have no doubt that a few men have benefited, the rest just serves as another revenue stream for these hustlers.

Ultimately, this year has been a year of self-discovery. I discovered who and what I am. I have yet to realize my full potential, but I know some pitfalls, who and what to avoid, the best way to succeed is not just about consuming more materials, but rather, to do/act without much forethought, don't worry about failures, don't bother to scheme and plan ways to get people. I should, instead, lead a life that enriches myself and others. This means that I'm not trying to "get sex" or take something away from people. Or in community lingo, bringing value to any interaction. Sex is a by-product of a successful life, not as a panacea for failing to live.

And living is worthwhile if one's life is shared with friends. The constant cycle of pump and dump one girl after another is a reflection of one's lack of character, lack of a "life." If our lives are to be meaningful, we have friends to be on this journey.

With that, I might return in 2008, or not... who knows?!

Sunday, December 23, 2007

The human whisperer

I was having a conversation with someone who just finished watching more in-field videos of pickup, yeah, they are all the rage right now. He was saying how the analysis by girls was all wrong... well, no shit. I think we can learn much more by watching the National Geographic TV: The Dog Whisperer with Cesar Millan.

The reason we are natural born followers is that we are genetically programmed to be pack/herd animals. In fact, I postulate that most of the world has the common delusion in believing in god because it is the most alpha/pack leader. So I wouldn't be surprised if we will locate a nucleus of neurons in our brain that is the "god center." Back to why we all should watch The Dog Whisperer.

An oft-repeated phrase that Cesar Millan used is that we should project "a calm assertive energy" and if we express what we want, people will comply. People have many commonalities with dogs... namely, our inherent natural tendency to follow the pack leader. In order to exude or project that to influence others, we must be at peace with ourselves, be comfortable in the environment, and we are social fun people... this is conveyed by our body language.

Going back to the same friend I had a discussion about how lame the analysis by girls and even worst was how ugly the girls getting picked up were! People who are not at peace with themselves or with others around them rarely if ever project that calm assertive energy. Girls have told me that they became physical with me because they not only felt right about what we were doing but they felt that was something I wanted! Sure, we need a brief initial attraction, just something to pique their interest. Then we have to shift gear into peaceful calm state but also be sufficiently pushy, because we have directions, goals, and ways to get there.

So if you are just starting, just go out, don't try to game, acclimate yourself to the environment, then slowly start talking to people, learn to have boring normal small talks... slowly weave in stories... learn to tease... then work the group using your "calm assertive energy." If you want to tame humans, start with learning how to get dogs to do what you want, pretty soon, you can turn girls into your bitches.

Friday, December 21, 2007

The girlfriend experience

I started writing this a few days ago, because I was so disturbed by what I saw. So I talked to a few friends about this topic... surprisingly, guys seem to be more against it and girls seem to be much more pragmatic about it. This started when I came across this C4 program: My Boyfriend The Sex Tourist.

The first part of the program showed guys going to these essentially brothels in a South American country where they have a selection of girls to pretend to be their girlfriends. That didn't bother me as much as how many of these guys resemble guys I've met in the community. The obligatory fat old guy, the ok-looking but creepy guy, and an effeminate guy who is in denial. All old, all desperate, all obviously come across as people who not only lack female companionship but also male buddies.

Because of my past history dealing with these losers, my opinion on the whole exploitive nature, how we are basically outsourcing sex. I was quite tolerant of people in the past, not just out of obligation but because I truly felt that everyone deserves a chance. Then I came into contact with these losers en masse in the community. My opinion gradually changed because I feel some of these people should not breed for the same reason that they can't be part of the herd.

I think it's fun to socialize with people, connect emotionally and physically. But the psychopathic nature of these guys, how they pick out vulnerable groups of girls... from underage to recent arrivals (i.e. FOBs) because then, it's a HUGE DHV for them to be either adults (who can get them beer, saw Superbad?) or as "Americans" (who know what's going on). Everyone can use more sex... but we have to draw the line somewhere, from the legal age (or we end up with more Britney's baby sis situation) to banning importation of sex workers. Seriously, if guys can't pick up girls their own age (i.e. above legal age) or girls who have similar background (similar awareness, intelligence, education, profession), then what do we have?

Some girls told me it's a mutual exploitation thing. Like any business transaction, is it mutual and fair? How do we decide if we don't have some arbitrary rules? Do children need protection? What about mentally handicapped adults? What about adults who are not as culturally aware?

Do these people need our protection? Or do we need to exert some self-control and not exploit vulnerabilities in others?! Most pickup methods are used for fun and games, because they can be used in social situations. But the psychopathic nature of these guys, they use them to exploit... I guess that's when I draw the line, from being a social guy who gets girls to being a hustler.

P.S. If you want to be good with women, get this book.

Wednesday, December 19, 2007

Girlfriends come and go

We made them come and hopefully, they will leave soon after. Be loud!

Monday, December 17, 2007

The easiest way to game

I try to keep up with some PU blogs and some of them are quite good. A recent entry by Juggler on how to SOI properly is a good read. It's still too complicated...

From what little experience I have, SOI is unnecessary if the girl is super attracted and sometimes, no matter how many disqualifications, negs, SOIs, push-pulls, she simply won't comply. Someone suggested I use game accelerators, I'm more likely to lose money betting on that than on a much simpler concept, it's the big number theory. If I talk with a large number of girls, eventually, I will get laid. Add in the mist of alcohol-induced haze, loud music, and just overall sex deprived state of most people, there's really no need for being so methodical.

In fact, I see the more people focused on this/that method, took multiple bootcamps, winged with more guys from the community, the less likely they have improved. For the simple reason of they focus too much on gaming, and not on having fun, being with people. Of course, there's also the flip side of being party animals while remaining celibate.

There is only one way to strike that right balance, that's using the In-her game (tm) method. Seriously though, this is really a numbers game. The more people we interact with, the quicker we will learn to click with people. Once we have acquired the ability to befriend and get people to open up to us... girls will soon open their legs, or at least bend over, and no, you don't need to drop a few grands on a workshop to learn that. Spend that on yourself. Then you can save yourself from learning a whole new vocabulary, microloop, microcalibration, DHV, IOI-IOD, push-pull, SOI, false sexual barriers, false time constraint, etc. Who else speak in specialized languages, abnormal people, but they make money speaking it... PUA-wannabe's are losing money and control by using other people's language.

There's no need to give away our power and ability to master our own destiny. The only way to succeed is to fail. There's no better way to toughen ourselves than getting hurt. No dating coach or anyone else can insulate us from pain of life, we learn from both negative and positive reinforcements. Those who do their best to avoid pain are avoiding life.

Friday, December 14, 2007

Computerized routines stack?

If this is true, another point for people running routines... and why it would work. For those with massive approach anxiety, one day, your computer may pick girls up, especially lonely needy attention starved fat "chicks on the internet," for you!

Tuesday, December 11, 2007

Rules of seduction

Would we better off with KJ's (and gay dating coaches trying to seduce those KJ's) OR these awkward hustlers?

Monday, December 10, 2007

Thursday, December 6, 2007

A men's movement?

Or are we raising a whole new generation of social retards?! Every time I hear someone talks about their "match date," I cringe. How have we evolved to the point that the only connection with people is through online? In fact, I would attribute our pussification to people not having the balls to deal with each other in person.

Before classifying me as a Luddite/technophobe, I started using IRC back when it was a telnet connection, no IRC client, no dozen IRC networks, in fact, I was using IRC on and off up until last year when it just sucked up too much of my free time, you know, away from time I can spend with ladies, not ladyboys! And yes, I have met my share of people online, mostly guys though. Some of them have been normal, but the majority, something about them is just a little bit off.

Why the diversion? Because the community is driven mostly by online forums, seduction websites, and blogs like this (and yes, this is only one thin slice out of my life). I have met quite a few bona fide PUA and I have seen most of them in action. Some of these guys are big shots at well known dating/seduction companies. One common statement they made, repetitively, is that they are helping men. Are they?

I'm in the business of helping people, professionally. The dirty little secret is that most of us do it because it's our job, sure, we make a difference here and there, but primarily, because this is all that we know how to do, or put it another way, we don't know how to do anything else. I would say the same about dating coaches, they suffer from the same Peter Principle syndrome. If I were to strip them away from "helping men," they would have to go back to their menial sales jobs making cold calls. Few, if any, left successful careers to be doing this. So do they truly do this out of altruism, or this is a career by exclusion. By that, I mean they do this as a last resort with nothing else to choose from?!

The sad part is... even though this isn't that bad of a job... most guys who do this are just hustler-wannabes. They have no skills... not even social skills; even a social retard, like myself, can tool them. Assuming the veracity of their reports, blogs, and mutual DHV's from their buddies can be backed up, VERY FEW of these guys are any good. Even if they are good, are they any good at teaching other guys?

This is no men's movement. We are becoming more and more like bonobo chimps, i.e., we are more free in expressing our sexuality, becoming more slutty, for both sexes. But somehow, a generation of social retards that's raised on computer think they have the solution of getting sex. The best thing to do is, just like how you wean yourself off internet porn, just push yourself away from your keyboard and go meet some people. Instead of whipping out your credit card to sign up for more workshops, buy more seduction materials, subscribe to more exclusive/collector's/premiere content. Just go out and interact with people, you will appreciate so many more nuances than just a blinking cursor.

Tuesday, December 4, 2007

The solution...

If you don't have the courage to go out and talk to girls... try this:

Don't know how to start? Join your local lair, and start PM'ing those guys who posted all those FR/LR, and those who offer workshop/bootcamp, just for the local lair members! They might not blow you away with their skills, but they are very skilled in blowing you!

Sunday, December 2, 2007

Letting go...

Approval seeking behavior can permeate from the initial approach all the way throughout the relationship. Success in opening all the way to !closing, in part, depends on not trying to get approval, IOI, validation,... from anyone, and especially girls. Being needy is usually unattractive to girls, especially if they are not attracted to the guy, and if he persists, he will be creepy. But if she's attracted, and the guy is needy, he might come across as endearing... at least in the beginning.

When I hang out with friends, I am open and honest with them, I say what's on my mind, usually without much filter between what goes on in my brain and what I verbalize. In fact, this blog is pretty much the same way. There's no need to create an avatar, a persona, something "attractive" to girls (or guys). I just be who I am. I live my life and whatever comes up, I'm sure I can deal with it. I find having the attitude of living in the moment very freeing; i.e., I don't get encumbered by the past or fixated about what to come.

This spontaneity is very important when I first meet someone. We have no history together and chances are, we probably won't have a future together. Our paths are crossing at this point and that's it. As nihilistic as this may sound, I find having this mindset very helpful in interacting with people; I don't want to take anything from them, I'm just there.

Another is once that I am in a relationship, I don't make myself too available and I also don't expect the same from girls. We limit how much time we spend together and we touch base once in awhile, mostly to set up a time to "meet." It's funny how when I let them go, they will eventually come back. This, of course, is dependent on having a strong identity.

It's better to give than to receive...

And I'm not just talking about STD's. This is so unusual, the holiday season is usually a very contemplative, introspective, and consequently, very depressive time for me. But this year, I am out and about, carefree, happy, talking, and connecting with people. There are still a few things I find lacking...







Need I post more? We must bring that those glory days.

Saturday, December 1, 2007

Oh, the community!

What am going to do? Should I take another workshop so I can get that high again? If only I can find more wings! BWAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAH!