Wednesday, August 22, 2007

Life is one shot, one opportunity, carpe diem

This is the 100th post and it's time to reflect on what has transpired. Much of life is about seizing that one moment, do not flinch, as Eminem asked, "Would you capture it or just let it slip?"

Life is more than just going through a series of motions and it is too short to be killing time. From the moment eye contact is made, we have to commit to initiating the interaction, if not, then don't bother. Once the interaction has started, we have to escalate, or that connection will go stale and it will, ultimately, fail. There are many turning points, and almost every turning point, we have to deal with each and every shit test effectively. Previously, I discussed about having the balls to open sets, afterward, it's all about keep talking until girls open up, some will and some won't. Success in opening is dependent on the first impression; that's why I suggested people to spend money on their look, better posture, body language, and some things everyone can change, hair style and wardrobe! Oops, if you don't have hair, I guess you can't change... I kid! Save your money on workshop, spend it on yourself first. If you truly have psych issues, get help from accredited individuals, as in the tried-and-true, proven-to-work, traditional therapy using medication if necessary, not more bootcamps, PUA materials, improv class, etc.

Afterward, it's all about talking, being interesting, and as I got better, I discover that attraction is easy too get and it's very fleeting. Try different ways, some girls are more responsive to the fun guy, others to the cool dude, and many to the insightful/introspective man; correspondingly, banter monkey, DHV storyteller, and of course, Juggler's open ended questions to get her to invest into the interaction. If the girl doesn't comply this early on, as in, banter back, stay to listen to the story, or to respond to OEQ, then either keep plowing or move on. Only experience in field can provide that calibration. Seize on her response, and keep escalate! Once she has committed to the interaction, then we have to be direct, express our interest, and lead! Girls must know the guy has done this before, that he knows what he wants and what he will do.

How do I know what to do? By going out and trying stuff on my own with some feedbacks from friends. Forget workshop, forget this blog and others, forget what I read... Be a man, be my own man. As shown in the picture earlier, eventually, I have arrived at the end of the road, the promise land, the oasis, it could be a mirage, or a dead lake with evaporation into thin air. In fact, most "dating coaches" and seduction-oriented companies are all about making money off us, so they are more devoted to marketing than to teaching... and least of all, care about us to be sure we are the right people to take it, and to improve with their materials.

Just look at the early fracturing between Mystery and RSD crew, Mystery Method Corp. (without Mystery) into Venusian Arts, recently, Juggler and his manager, and hot off the press, Pickup101 and Sean Newman/Messenger. Who can ignore the Walmart of seduction materials, David D, first he tried directing it to girls, with Christian Carter, now, he, back as himself as Eben Pagan, has turned back to marketing people who he learned all those tricks to sell "cocky & funny" to us.

As scary and even as negative as this sounds, I did, I failed, I learned, and I kept repeating. The only thing that sometimes suffered has been my ego. But when I recall all my fond memories, a few bruises to my ego are the cost to improving me. Just do it. Don't worry about what others think, by impressing or teaching others, be who you are, be a man.

4 comments:

Vibe said...

I agree about companies trying to make money of retarded things such as "Attraction Hand Test" and latest and greatest way to meet girls. Some promise bullshit like "buy our product and find how girls will approach YOU". Any time some one promises some quick easy shit, it's a marketing gimmick. Sometimes I just want to shit on some of these dating gurus because they're after money. They don't give a shit about helping people.

Ian Paredes said...

agreed. i'm at odds with your battle cry for everyone to "be a man" however, mostly because it has western societal connotations that lead us to act in ways not entirely genuine to who we really are. (i'm not talking about any hidden repressed feminine traits, but rather traits that are not normally associated with the popular western "stoic man.")

i find that i'm a really social guy in general now, but i don't try to act "like a man" or whatever, but rather, i simply like hearing what everyone has to say. i always try to pry wisdom out of every person i meet, and i likewise reciprocate through being myself, flaws included.

the best conversations that i've had with people are those where we are ourselves and there's no sort of expectation to be "fun" or "energetic" or whatever. and these conversations are the times when i really connect with people, where they feel connected to me, etc. i know, you'll probably think, "fuck you and your new age shit!!!", but it seems to be the best way to "reel" in anyone.

anyway, i gotta stop writing goddamn essays on your blog. :p

Possibility said...

I suppose its better to be the man than to be the user, and get your rocks off by fulfilling your potential rather than fulfilling your pockets robbing people of hope for theirs. Good post, I'd love to go more in depth with it but my disposable time is scarce. Good hearing your thoughts, brother.

DDD said...

Yeah, if you got more to say, go write on your own blog! :P

My version is be a man means to be whatever I say a man is... you can read all those entries labeled "howto" because I have the definitive final say on what is being a man! :)