From geeks to gamers

The community is comprised predominately of guys from the computer industry. I have never worked in it so I wouldn't know. In my line of work, we deal with people all day long and our success is determined mostly by our social skills and in rare instances, technical knowledge. What began as a discussion at work on why most guys will "hit it" with almost any girl, we ended up talking on being normal, which reminded me of what I wrote awhile back. I see becoming a “pickup artist” as a two-step process for many guys: 1. normal, fun and social 2. pickup artist.

Most guys starting in the community tend to be shy, introverted, perhaps even geeky individuals who didn’t undergo the usual socialization process. Before they can start “gaming” girls, I believe they have to learn to be normal first. By normal, they have to be able to to relate to people (gender independent), chill, relax, and have fun.

A good test whether someone is a normal and social person is: If this person were to be introduced to a group of (non-community) friends in a social setting, would this person able to befriend those people and he is just so cool that they want include him into their social circle?!

Some normal turned community guys I know are afraid of introducing community guys to their normal friends because guys who study to become pickup artists but didn’t go through the stage of being normal & social tend to be a bit off, and tend to weird out normal people. If someone can’t relate to people on a friendly term without gaming them; by that, I mean this person can only talk about the game, or whatever geeky esoteric topics not that many people care about, he is doing this ALL WRONG!

Many guys I’ve met from the community can’t walk up and chill out/befriend with normal guys hanging out at bars. Instead, they would read and try to apply AMOG tactics, when in reality, the best way to steal a girl from anyone or group is to be the guy who brings value, who is more fun, and who is more socially savvy than the rest of the group. If someone can’t do that, my suggestion to this person is to step back, stop gaming, and learn to be normal, learn to have fun, tell a few dirty jokes, and god forbid, even be AFC so that one can relate to normal people.

I notice many community guys are very intelligent yet quite shy. In actuality, they have this sense of arrogance, as though they are above commoners. Despite what community guys think of lay people, the latter are probably getting more lays than those in the community. I recognize that where I work and what we do, we are in our ivory towers. This attitude of superiority, in fact, is what prevents many of us from relating to people. Just chill, life is more than just a race of intellect and one-up-man-ship.

The whole idea of gaming is about being normal, fun, and social. This means being able to strike up a conversation with a stranger anywhere, making small talks about mundane, boring subjects and can connect with people in general.

Go read a book, learn something new (not just openers and routines), be interested and interesting. If someone doesn’t have a life outside of gaming, he can’t game. Be a normally engaging guy first, that people enjoy his company. Be comfortable in one's own skin.

This is a 2-step process if someone is not already socially savvy, FIRST learn to be normal & social, THEN learn to game girls. This is supposed to be fun, not work. I'm not one of those PU workshop instructors, I think the minute I turn this into a money making venture, I would have a difficult time keep going out to have fun being social. Then my goal isn't to enjoy the company of others, and my actions would be to hustle other guys so that I can maximize profit, thus I would have to seduce men instead of women; yes, that would be very gay!